Fox Rebooting Fantastic Four: Do You Care?

By  · Published on September 1st, 2009

There are many things in this life that do not make me want to bang my head against the trash can by my desk. That’s right. Surprise.

I have a desk.

But for some reason, the news that Fox is planning on revamping a series whose last film came out as late as 2007 baffles me to the point of shoving my head into a trash compactor. Not that I have anything specifically against Fox, even though it seems like it, the reason they need to reboot anything is because they failed to create lasting franchises in the first place.

And according to Variety, this bad boy is coming courtesy of Akiva Goldsman. Yes, friends! From the Producer that brought you Deep Blue Sea AND Mindhunters AND Poseidon AND I Am Legend AND Hancock comes a reboot of a franchise that Fox has no idea how to create or market in the first place.

Am I being too harsh yet?

I realize that this news is coming fresh off the heels that Disney has purchased Marvel, and everyone should care, but I just can’t get all that excited about it. I don’t think that this is Fox trying to win the news cycle by reminding everyone that they control a bunch of Marvel properties, and that Goldsman is also producing several other comic properties. I’m not as cynical as all that. But I am cynical enough to question whether this is really what the world needs right now. Even if it comes without the director and stars of Fantastic Four and The Rise of Silver Surfer. Which, there’s no word on whether they’ll be involved, but why would you reboot and use the old cast? I’m sure there’s something about new wine and old wineskin here that’s pertinent.

A studio and a crappy producer taking another shot at a film franchise that they messed up less than five years ago. Isn’t that a bit like a third-grader losing the 50-yard dash on Field Day and wanting a rematch the next day? Sure, it’s cute because he’s tenacious, but does anyone earnestly expect him to win?

Shouldn’t that third-grader just be remaking Deep Blue Sea or something?

Seriously? Deep Blue Sea remake. You in?

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