Listen as Anthony Hopkins throws away all that good will he earned with Westworld.
Few things are as reliable out of Hollywood as a new Michael Bay movie. That isn’t a statement of quality – obviously – but instead an observation that his movies by and large share certain elements from film to film.
They’re always loud. They always feature lots of action. They typically include a lot of CG. And sometimes, more often than not, they’re aimed squarely at men with pre-teen boys stuck inside of them.
With that image now in your head, check out the first trailer for Bay’s latest – Transformers: The Last Knight.
Bumblebee’s dead y’all.
Look, I’ll be honest. I’m not the biggest fan of the Transformers franchise – I didn’t even finish watching Age of Extinction. I’m not anti-Bay though as I’m a big fan of 13 Hours, Pain & Gain, The Rock, and yes, even The Island. This series is just a whole lot of messy CG action, and the end result is extremely dull and incredibly dumb.
But enough about my opinion on the past four films, what do I think about this trailer?!
I don’t like it. (An auto-tuned trailer song? Really? Points for it being The Flaming Lips’ “Do You Realize” but still.)
Mark Wahlberg returns as the (admittedly) terrifically named Cade Yeager, and it appears the fight against these evil machines wannabes has become a full-time job. I’ll admit to a mild curiosity about the historical angle – presuming these scenes weren’t filmed just for the trailer – as that dragon appears to be A) non-historical and B) a GoBot, but the entire mythology of the Autobots and Decepticons leaves me yawning.
Each film appears to have a global, earth-shattering importance, so it’s unclear if these stakes are higher or just more recent. We’ll find out when Transformers: The Last Knight opens June 23rd, 2017.