Pixels Trailer: Q*bert is the New Slimer

I have so many questions about the plot of Pixels. What sort of confusion about our video games could even lead to aliens sending back those video games’ characters and props and game play to attack us? Why are they made of pixels and why do they turn things into pixels? Why would they include things like the Donkey Kong hammer and have them able to be held and used by humans against the other lethal elements?

I have a feeling that none of these questions will be answered in the actual movie, and that’s fine. I didn’t need to know the explanation behind all the ghosts of Ghostbusters, either, particularly why there were so many different kinds of ghosts. Speaking of ghosts, though, does anyone else get the impression that Q*bert is filling the role of Slimer in this movie, which already seemed like a Ghostbusters wannabe?

There’s oddly no address in the new Pixels trailer of Q*bert or why he appears to be working with the Earthlings. That doesn’t align him with Slimer in the Ghostbusters movies. It’s more like the sloppy green blob’s role in the cartoon series and comic books. Maybe Q*bert isn’t sent by the aliens. Maybe the good guys figured out how to make their own pixel character. The original Q*bert game was likely released too late in 1982 to have been included in that space capsule anyway.

Oh, here’s another question: where does that hot, kick-ass lady made of pixels come from? Don’t recognize any video game characters that look like Ashley Benson? That’s because that one is made up for the movie and called Dojo Quest. She’s called Lady Lisa. She’s also an obligatory part of movies like this. Aliens love to tempt Earthlings with hot woman disguises, as seen in Mars Attacks!, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Species, Under the Skin, et al.

Pixels, which stars Adam Sandler, Josh Gad, Kevin James, Peter Dinklage and Michelle Monaghan and is directed by Chris Columbus, hits theaters on July 24th.

Here’s your reminder that the source short by Patrick Jean is much better:

Christopher began writing film criticism and covering film festivals for a zine called 'Read,' back when a zine could actually get you Sundance press credentials.