5. Michael in Tammy and the T-Rex (1994)
Before he skyrocketed to fame as part of the Fast & Furious franchise, the beautiful Paul Walker had a knack for playing himbos. His speech in front of the entire school in Varsity Blues is a prime example of that dumbass charm on full display. Before that, however, he played Michael in Tammy and the T-Rex.
In the movie, he wears crop tops and is googly-eyed for Denise Richards. Then his brain is transplanted into a robotic dinosaur and he becomes even dreamier. Say what you will about the film’s quality (it’s great), but it’s the only movie out there that features a himbo becoming a dinosaur. That’s true character development. (Kieran Fisher)
4. Rocky Horror in The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
“I’ve been making a man/with blonde hair and a tan/and he’s good for relieving my tension,” Tim Curry’s Dr. Frank-N-Furter croons in one of The Rocky Horror Picture Show’s most iconic songs, and he’s not wrong. Our boy Rocky (Peter Hinwood) is exactly that — a blonde, tan man who’s good at sex — and nothing more. He’s the product of a mad scientist whose plan for creating a new human didn’t take into account anything beyond the ripped, gold-hot-pants-covered surface.
Even though Rocky is little more than a hot Frankenstein parody, it’s hard not to love this simple creature of the night. Rocky is an ideal horror himbo because he’s a sweetly innocent dummy who didn’t ask to be brought into this over-complicated world. Audiences want to protect him and smooch him in equal measure. (Valerie Ettenhofer)
3. Nick Jones in House of Wax (2005)
The House of Wax remake s the answer to the question “what if someone very, very loosely remade the 3D Vincent Price-led period-piece from the 1950s as The O.C.?” And what’s a new millennium sitcom without a beautiful, dumb boy? Luckily, in the mid-2000s, Chad Michael Murray was the Michael Jordan of playing beautiful, dumb boys. The Chad Michael Murray Jordan, if you will.
Murray plays Nick Jones, an archetypal baddie with a heart of gold ripped straight off the CW network. The only thing sharper than his rough exterior is his jawline. And even then, when the going gets tough, all of Nick’s douchey characteristics magically fade away. Luckily, what he lacks in smarts (he starts a fire in a building made of wax, bless him), he makes up for in crossbow skills. Which is good, because this horror himbo and his twin sister have to stay alive while a different, evil set of twins try and turn them into wax statues. (Meg Shields)
2. Ron Grady in A Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy’s Revenge (1985)
Himbo extraordinaire, beloved frenemy, and proud owner of a leather duvet, Grady (Robert Rusler) has got it all. And by it all, we mean a few pecans short of a pie, but a whole lot to love. On the himbo scale, he gets a Grade A-plus. Sure, he loses points for being unreliable and falling asleep on Jesse, but that single instruction was a lot to remember.
While Jesse and Grady started out as rivals, these guys bein’ dudes quickly developed into pals. I’ll leave it to you to read between the lines in that regard. Ultimately, he’s an ill-fated pretty boy who gets wrecked by Freddy before the third act, but not before he’s established as a dear piece of eye candy who will be missed immensely. RIP, you sweet second-base prince. (Anna Swanson)
1. Ash Williams in The Evil Dead (1981), Evil Dead II (1987), and Army of Darkness (1992)
The undisputed patron saint of the himbos is Johnny Bravo. And if horror has a Johnny Bravo, it’s Ash Williams. He’s a beefcake, he’s dumber than a sack of rocks, and he’s trying to set things right, damn it. There’s a school of thought that says to be a himbo you need a kind heart. And while Ashley Williams isn’t exactly a boy scout, he’s doing his best. Now, his best usually involves re-opening portals to Hell, but that’s exactly the kind of behavior we expect from dumb jocks in incredible demonic circumstances.
He’s horror’s loveable dumbass. He is incapable of anything and everything except for fighting the titular Evil Dead. In Bruce Campbell’s words: Ash is “a bad slow thinker and a good fast thinker.” He knows his way around brute force, but the finer details of not enabling Kandarian demons are a bit fuzzy. He’s a laid back ladies man with a jawline as deadly as his chainsaw-hand. Hail to the horror himbo king, baby. (Meg Shields)
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Related Topics: 31 Days of Horror Lists, Horror
