Killer Klowns

Welcome back to Junkfood Cinema; send in the Mounds, or at least the Almond Joy. This is the weekly internet column that may appear as any other, but go in for a closer whiff and get sprayed in the face with our hilarious lack of taste; wholly evident in the phrasing of that last sentence alone. Every week we bring a bad movie to the middle of the center ring. We mock it, we roast it, we hit it repeatedly in the face with a lemon harangue pie. But then, we bring out the giant seltzer bottle of whacked appreciation, which is a totally real thing. Once the foolish movie feels only slightly less foolish, we offer a reprieve from this metaphorical circus in the form of a decadently unwise snack food item themed to that movie. October is here, and that can mean only one thing…the end of voter registration! Actually, that wasn’t what we were thinking, but it is an important reminder and we implore you to do your civic duty. Hehe, doody. No, for those of me here at Junkfood Cinema October means a month-long celebration of the greatest holiday this side of the annual return of the McRib: Halloween. In an ongoing effort to keep our wanton mediocrity at least on theme, we’re once again instituting Junkfood Horror. We begin this year’s slate with a hilarious bit of federal mail fraud. We maybe kinda definitely don’t worry about it intercepted a letter to the Chiodo brothers […]

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published: 01.30.2015
published: 01.29.2015
published: 01.28.2015
published: 01.28.2015

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