Thora Birch

BadKickstarter

This is probably the worst Kickstarter campaign ever made. Granted, it doesn’t have pay-me-to-stalk-Adam-Sandler comic appeal (or that project’s success!), but it does feature an individual with purported ties to the industry failing at every single level and offering a great teaching moment for people seeking crowdfunding (or a rubbernecking opportunity for everyone else). That’s the good news. There’s a lot of advice buried in the rubble. According to her website, Linda Stuart is a former lecturer at the American Film Institute, a former staff story analyst at Paramount and a script consultant for hire who will provide a full script overview (with handwritten and typed notes) for only $1,200 (a steal! (note: not a steal)). Now she wants $5M to make a comedy called Kate Allen is Getting a Life that might star several actresses who were popular in the late 1990s. She emailed us asking to publicize the campaign, and I can honestly say that we’re going to do that. Just not in the way she was probably hoping for. Fortunately, others can learn from these mistakes and find themselves on their way to crowdfunding success. If that’s your goal, check out everything Stuart did and do the opposite.

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I am legitimately worried about I Am Number Four star Alex Pettyfer. Of course, he doesn’t need my concern – the 20-year-old star of director D.J. Caruso’s teen alien flick is on the rise, with two movies in the can (Beastly and Andrew Niccol’s Now) and a slew of others in the works. That’s how Hollywood operates: hone in on young talent, put them in a zillion movies and let it ride. The difficult part is the escape plan, transcending above “it” star to full-fledged “actor.” The pretty faces of Twilight are attempting to keep the ball rolling, while Daniel Radcliffe of Harry Potter may have already escaped the gravitational pull of teen star suckage – but it ain’t easy. This is why I fear for Pettyfer. He has obvious talent, and I Am Number Four occasionally allows him to play with more than his Teen Beat-worthy pouty faces. But if Pettyfer intends to stick around and grow up into something substantial, he’s going to have to learn an important lesson from fallen heartthrobs and by looking to the past.

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Should you ride this terror train or shell out the case for a flight instead?

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deadline-header

An attractive, traumatized girl in a big, spooky, empty Victorian home all by herself, investigating some sort of tragedy while she avoids her own personal dangers. Sounds like fun, if you ask me…

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published: 12.18.2014
C-
published: 12.17.2014
B+
published: 12.15.2014
B
published: 12.12.2014
D+


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