The Governator

Arnold Schwarzenegger in The Expendables 2

Just like a cybernetic killing machine from the future, Arnold Schwarzenegger just can’t be stopped. Sure, he can take long breaks between sequels or be a two-term Governor of one of the biggest states of the union, but he’ll always be back. Now that his political tenure has come to an end, Arnold is going back to doing what he does second best: acting. First best is lifting heavy things, of course. Aside from his cameos in The Expendables and Around the World in 80 Days, Schwarzenegger has been absent from the big screen for around nine years – his last leading role was Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. If your life somehow felt more meaningless in that period, you are not alone – and relief is coming as we break down Schwarzenegger’s upcoming confirmed and rumored film appearances.

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What is Movie News After Dark? When it was first being written tonight, it was going to be a very silly column. Then some serious (and seriously awesome) links were found and you were saved from a fate far more ridiculous than usual. We’ll save that for another time. In this moment, on this night, Movie News After Dark presents you with all kinds of interesting things, words and doo-dads. But most of all, there will be fun. Aziz Ansari and Jesse Eisenberg are just around the building, ready to do something that will undoubtedly lead to hilarity in Ruben Fleischer’s 30 Minutes or Less, the film that will combine pizza delivery with the plot concept of Speed. Doesn’t that just make you urgently hungry? This new look is part of a slew of Entertainment Weekly magazine clippings found over at The Playlist.

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In recent weeks, news came out that Arnold Schwarzenegger would be returning to the entertainment industry, but not quite the way everyone expected. It appeared that Schwarzenegger would be teaming with Marvel Comics legend Stan Lee to create a new superhero comic and TV series titled The Governator. It was then announced that in addition to the comic book and series, that a 3-D feature film was being put into production. But the question still remains… What can we expect from the project? Well that question has been answered with a trailer:

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When you grab Mike Tyson to be in your comedy about drunk guys, it’s stunt casting. So what do you call it when you hire a former actor/former Governor to play an animated, superhero version of himself for a film? What do you call it when the entire movie is stunt cast? When The Governator was going to be an animated series, it sounded sort of silly, but having him come out in comic books, a television series, a web-series and a 3D movie just seems like culture being shoved down the throats of consumers who didn’t ask for it. The last time an idea was this bewildering was then Jerry Seinfeld chose to come out of retirement for Bee Movie. There’s a place for average children’s films, but as a return to glory from a long hiatus? Not a chance. That’s what’s going on here. Schwarzenegger is returning in a major way to movies, and his first definite “Yes” is to the cartoonification of himself that seeks to solidify a joke nickname he gave himself during his campaign. On the other hand, if this works, we can expect to see Dubya animated and up on screen alongside Tippecanoe and Tyler Too. According to Deadline Cannes, The Governator may or may not take on Muammar Qaddafi, which is absolutely reassuring. This whole thing sounds like senility has started to creep in.

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What is Movie News After Dark? Like your collegiate sex life, it will be in and out quick with nothing very interesting to say. It will, however, deliver unto you all the magical and wondrous movie news of the day. And it promises to call you the next day, because you’re a person, dammit. We open tonight with images of humans running away from fireballs. It must be time for a Michael Bay update. This one is from Transformers: Dark of the Moon, and it includes zero robots. Not quite as interesting as the ones that include robots, but still quite ‘splosiony.

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published: 11.26.2014
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published: 11.26.2014
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published: 11.21.2014
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published: 11.21.2014
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