Super Bowl

Iron Man 3

It goes without saying these days that one of the highlights of the Super Bowl every year are the big budget, balls to the wall commercials that come out, pimping everything from Doritos to cars to farmers and, of course, the big, upcoming summer movies. It’s a launching pad as big as San Diego Comic-Con – actually, much bigger, since millions are watching, so when you make a Super Bowl commercial, you make it big. The spots cost millions of dollars for just a few seconds – you really have to impress to get your money’s worth. Perhaps the most anticipated movie trailer set to debut during the Super Bowl was from this May’s Iron Man 3. With a release date so close, the film undoubtedly has a lot of film in the can (or digital files in the computer), and while there is no doubt tons of work still to be done, they could probably create a masterful and crazy exciting trailer. So why didn’t they?

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What is Movie News After Dark? It’s a nightly collection of movie and television news that throws caution to the wind, but never ever pees into the wind. That’s just not smart, friends. We begin this evening and this week with artist Kinjamin’s depiction of the Community cast as the characters from Street Fighter. It was found via Twitter, as posted by the show’s executive producer Dan Harmon. Needless to say, it’s inspired. So inspired, perhaps, that it makes us hope that Harmon is writing this one down. How about a Street Fighter episode in season four? Hey NBC, how about a season four?

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Channel Guide - Large

Man, of all the bowls, the Super Bowl is probably the most egotistical. Super Bowl? Pshaw. More like the Not-Super Bowl. Yeah, I said it. First played in 1967, the Super Bowl was the brainchild of some guys who loved football almost as much as they loved Roman numerals (Super Bowl XL was the year that it was at its t-shirt-sizey-ist). The “big game” marks the end of the NFL season and this is apparently a “big deal” – Super Bowl XLV was the most watched television broadcast in America last year. But if you ask me – and maybe you aren’t asking me, but let’s just pretend you are  the only bowl worth watching this weekend is the Puppy Bowl VII – Animal Planet’s annual Yule Log-esque special, featuring roughly (or, ahem, ruffly) two hours of adorable puppies playing on a model football stadium replete with chew toys and water bowls. Yep, water bowls. So that’s two bowls you’re getting for the price of one. Already, I think you’re starting to see why the Puppy Bowl is better than whatever’s happening in Indianapolis this Sunday.

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Culture Warrior

Episodes and seasons and weeks after its inspiration and its humor have peaked, I still continue to watch new episodes of The Office week in and week out. I don’t know why – I never do this with dramatic shows, only with comedies – but I tend to stick with comedy shows whose legacy I appreciate even if their time has passed, either out of respect, blind hope, or simply the desire to have some noise in the room while I take a break to eat a meal or fold laundry. While The Office certainly isn’t what it used to be, even before Steve Carell left, it’s still an inoffensive and enjoyable way to pass some time. I can’t deny that the affinity I developed for the show’s characters early on in the series has carried me through a lot of its creative droughts (in other words, I hardly watch it only for its comedy) even as more recent network sitcoms like Modern Family, Community, and (especially) Parks and Recreation have made me LOL significantly more often. But in the bizarre cameos leading up to a strange and dry seventh season finale, The Office seems to have encountered much greater problems than a rudimentary lack of inspiration typical for the (possibly cyclical) lifespan of a long-running television show. The Office seems to have rejected the defining characteristics that made it unique in the first place.

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Sunday night FOX put on the yearly spectacle known as The Super Bowl. And despite botched national anthems and crappy half time shows, the 45th football throw down managed to set the record for the highest viewership of any television program, ever in the history of television. The number? One hundred and eleven million people. This also marks the first time any network, in this case FOX, has crossed the one hundred million mark in a single prime time evening. Now I know what you’re saying to yourself, “so what? It was the f’n Super Bowl, of course it was high.” And I agree, but I’m not here to focus on the Super Bowl, but rather what that number represents.

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Boiling Point

There has been the odd occasion throughout the years we’ve taken a moment to talk about commercials. Whether it was starring Michael Bay (Verizon FiOS is AWESOME) or directed by him (Victoria’s Secret is out), or just something especially cool, we’ll talk about it. So it would then make sense to talk about them now, the day after the Super Bowl, which is far more entertaining because of the commercials than the actual game. Okay, the fourth quarter was alright this year. Anyway, I don’t walk to talk about the specifics of these commercials because that’s not actually what this is about. You see, this year I did a little experiment. I didn’t watch most of the Super Bowl and I skipped almost all of the commercials. Why? Because I wanted to know if I had seen them already. So when people started describing these commercials to me about how funny they were – I already knew. And that is bullshit. Click through to find out why.

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If you’re like me, you watch the Super Bowl for one reason: you can eat as many fried mac ‘n’ cheese balls as you want without so much as a dirty look. If there’s another reason to watch, it’s because Puppy Bowl has gotten repetitive. If there’s a third, it’s the commercials – specifically the movie trailers. Most of the movie trailers this year gave just a bit more insight into trailers we’ve already seen, but a select few (like Transformers 3 and Super 8) gave us our first look into the worlds being created for the big screen. Fortunately, like the PSAs that get to air for free during the big game, these movie trailers also taught us a lot. Especially about the trends of 2011 that are already emerging. Here are just ten things we learned.

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What is Movie News After Dark? This is a question that I am almost never asked, but I will answer it for you anyway. Movie News After Dark is FSR’s newest late-night secretion, a column dedicated to all of the news stories that slip past our daytime editorial staff and make it into my curiously chubby RSS ‘flagged’ box. It will (but is not guaranteed to) include relevant movie news, links to insightful commentary and other film-related shenanigans. I may also throw in a link to something TV-related here or there. It will also serve as my place of record for being both charming and sharp-witted, but most likely I will be neither of the two. I write this stuff late at night, what do you expect?

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VacationSequelQuestion

Sometimes I feel like I’m just getting back from Wally World. I’m tired, irritable, and there’s an unseasonably high urine count in my sandwiches.  But with the news that Chevy Chase and Beverly D’Angelo are teaming up for a Superbowl commercial, I have to wonder if we should really be saving up for a real family vacation. Don’t get me wrong. I love Superbowl commercials because 1) they are a colossal let down and 2) I’m usually watching the Puppy Bowl instead (after the NFC championship, don’t we sort of already know who’s going to win the Superbowl?), but I would much rather see that dynamic duo hit the big screen again. I know I’m usually pretty negative toward the lack of creativity that this decade will be marred by, but if we’re in for a penny, why not be in for a pound? Let’s just sequelize everything. All of it. Some possible downsides to a National Lampoon’s Vacation sequel in the here and now: National Lampoon, like the magazine that spawned it, has become one of the least funny producers of The Funny around. With John Hughes gone, who could possibly write it? Year One Some urine-soaked food for thought. What do you think?

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Michael Bay Will Blow Shit Up at the Super Bowl

Per his personal website, the director is announcing when during the big game you’ll be able to see Giant F***ing Robots.

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Psych

When the SBPD finds a severed foot along a hiking trail, they call in Shawn and Gus to find the rest of the body. Through non-psychic shenanigans, they figure out the foot belonged to a field goal kicker for the local pro football team, the Thunderbirds.

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