Red Skull


As we all sit here at Reject HQ, gathered around an absurdly long, but incredibly imposing, table discussing what to do with the nuclear missiles we just “creatively appropriated” from a breakaway Russian republic, it occurs to us that 2011 was a great year to be bad. For every boring, dopey, goody-good hero that popped up on the silver screen, there was a brilliant, super cool, woefully misunderstood villain doing everything he/she/it could to thwart the zero hero at every turn. So when Supreme Commander #1, better known to the world (and those pesky Avengers so they’ll stop blasting our lair) as Neil Miller, issued an official order (delivered by a specially-trained, fire-breathing, gun-toting alligator who lives in the moat) to construct a supersonic death ray…that assignment went to Kate “Femme Fatale” Erbland. But then I got asked to do this list of the 20 Best Villains of 2011, a decided promotion from my usual position as sinister cocktail-fetcher and cleaner of the diabolical gutters.



Welcome back to Junkfood Cinema; the home of the brave. Here at JFC, we are one nation united under our love for schlock. Every week we salute the standard-bearers of terrible films. First we savagely thrash at the film’s faults; clawing at it like a bald eagle startled into rage by a thunderous fireworks display. But then, once we’ve knocked the stars and stripes out of it, we dust it off and slowly raise it back up with our unabashed adoration like Old Glory at Iwojima. We sing its praises like we’re Toby Keith in September and prove that yes we can…unironically appreciate crappy films. To punctuate this, our other national pastime, we will pair the film with a patriotically delicious junkfood item to storm the beaches of your intestinal fortitude much in the same fashion that the film declares war on your brain cells. This week’s treat: Captain America.



Entertainment Weekly has posted the first official image of the Red Skull from Joe Johnston’s Captain America: The First Avenger and he looks exactly like I imagined he would. Sure, it kind of seems like they just spray-painted the Skeletor mask from Masters of the Universe red and put a guy in a leather jacket, but what else are you going to do? The character is a dude with a skull for a head that’s bright red; there aren’t many options there for creativity. I have one big question after looking at the photo: I thought Red Skull was a Nazi, where are all the swastikas? What we see is a very black, leathery, militaristic look that seems to be right in line with what some sort of high-ranking Nazi official might wear; but where I would imagine there would be swastikas, instead there are Hydra logos. I’m not the biggest Marvel Comics historian on the Internet, but I thought that Hydra came about from the ashes of the Nazi’s defeat in WWII? Am I wrong? Is this movie not all set during the war like I thought it was? Or, God forbid, are they homogenizing away the existence of Nazis? If I don’t get to see Steve Rogers clock Hitler in the jaw, I’m going to be pretty upset. Check it out for yourself:


Red Skull Captain America

As disappointed as some might be that Hugo Weaving won’t be wearing the Halloween costume made for his character Red Skull in Captain America: The First Avenger, this look seems to be doing him a lot more favors. The only question seems obvious. Why the fake human face? Why can’t you just be comfortable being yourself, Red Skull? You’re cool being a Nazi, but you can’t go out in public with what looks like a wicked case of Rosacea? We’ll accept you the way you are, Skull. Then, we’ll cheer when Captain America puts you in a head luck and shoves his fingers where your nostrils should be. What do you think of Red Skull’s look?

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published: 02.01.2015
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published: 01.30.2015

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