Pirates

Boiling Point

They say laughter is the best medicine and well, world, I’m dying here. I need my medicine. I need to laugh. I need to be entertained, but it seems every time I try to chuckle these days, someones standing right there to make me feel bad about it. Over the last few weeks in this column, I’ve mostly pointed the finger at big corporate entities bowing to some outside force, whether it’s a perceived notion that they must be politically correct to the point of being historically incorrect or whether it’s removing a joke that probably cost thousands of dollars to animate to not offend a small handful of people in a far off land with a disease that’s rapidly disappearing. Today, I point my finger elsewhere. I point it at you. I point it at them. I point it at us, a society that has lost its sense of humor – and that is a damn shame.

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After leaving the Bourne franchise behind, Paul Greengrass made Green Zone (which might as well have been called The Bourne Historical Rewrite) and has been attempting to get his Martin Luther King, Jr film Memphis off the ground with Scott Rudin. As it turns out, Rudin may have something different in mind. According to Deadline Mogadishu, Greengrass has been offered the directing job for the Somali pirate movie based on Richard Phillips’s memoir “A Captain’s Duty.” The book chronicles his experience as the skipper of the Maersk Alabama, which was taken by Somali pirates. Phillips was held hostage before being rescued by Navy SEALs. Tom Hanks has signed on to star. This project has been percolating at the script phase for a year and a half, and there’s an honest question about whether the subject matter is all that compelling. At the very least, it’ll be culturally fascinating to see a boom in Navy SEAL movies coming out all around the same time, and Christmas Entertainment also has a Somali pirate movie called Dawn on the Gulf of Aden in development. Otherwise, the main question is how much shakier Greengrass’s camera would be on the open ocean.

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What kind of man does Errol Flynn play in his debut on screen? The kind of man you like. A man with money. Not only did this film launch Flynn, it also launched 8 more movies where Flynn and Olivia de Havilland would share romance (and a little swashbuckling). It’s a fantastic example of the genre with big set pieces, great action, and a salty amount of fun. Oddly enough, it was also the first of 12 films where iconic director Michael Curtiz would work with Flynn, a man he hated (and who hated him right back). Funny how business works out.

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I don’t watch Spike because I didn’t date rape anyone in college, but I’m starting to think that I should. Watch the station, not date rape someone. Why? Because apparently they have a show where science (science!) determines who would win in an epic battle of the most intense warriors of all time. Now, we can report that Night at the Museum director Shawn Levy (who’s currently wrapping Real Steel) wants to bring Deadliest Warrior to the big screen.

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