Kaare Andrews

Image Entertainment

A small outbreak of a nasty flesh-eating virus has left a single survivor, and now the scientists responsible for it all have turned Porter (Sean Astin) into a human lab rat. Having watched his only son melt in his arms, Porter’s far from a willing participant in the experimentation and instead just wants to return to his wife. Elsewhere on the island four friends have arrived for an impromptu bachelor party. Marcus (Mitch Ryan) is a day away from getting married, so when his brother Josh (Brando Eaton) and their friends Dobbs (Ryan Donowho) and Penny (Jillian Murray) suggest the overnight trip to a secluded island he finds it hard to resist. A brief swim along the shore reveals a curious absence of sea life, but that doesn’t interfere with diving of another sort back in the tent… and it’s not long before the dangers of island cunnilingus come very, very clear. And bloody. They come very, very bloody. Cabin Fever: Patient Zero is the third in the franchise begun twelve years ago by Eli Roth, but while it’s still far from a gem of horror cinema it holds its own thanks to an abundance of expertly crafted and wonderfully gooey gore.

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Everybody remembers the 2002 horror film Cabin Fever; it was the movie that made you fall either in love or hate with Eli Roth. And it was a movie about a bunch of kids in a cabin who get stricken with a very violent and rapidly spreading flesh-eating virus. That’s all well and good, but have you ever felt like the original Cabin Fever was just scratching the surface of what the disease-ridden world it created had to offer? No? Well, somebody did, and that’s why there’s a prequel in the works. Sure, watching a bunch of attractive young people get eaten alive by a gruesome disease is fun times, but haven’t you ever wondered what really made that virus tick? Where did it come from, and what was its motivation? Jake Wade Wall (The Hitcher) has written a script entitled Cabin in the Woods: Patient Zero that’s sure to answer all of these burning questions and more. It tells the tale of a Caribbean cruise that runs aground on a research island. One can only assume that the thing being researched there is horrible diseases, because soon after the shipwreck, the passengers of said ship find themselves falling ill and fighting for survival. It kind of sounds like a cross between the original film and Lost, which is a concept that probably has some box office potential.

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By now you’ve already heard about The ABCs of Death – the anthology project being put together by Drafthouse Films, Timpson Films and Magnet. 26 directors, 26 letters of the alphabet, and 26 tales of horror and gore. The complete list of directors includes: Kaare Andrews, Angela Bettis, Ernesto Diaz Espinoza, Jason Eisener, Bruno Forzani and Helene, Adrian Garcia Bogliao, Xavier Gens, Noburo Iguchi, Thomas Malling, Yoshihiro Nishimura, J.T. Petty, Banjong Pisanthanakun, Simon Rumley, Marcel Sarmiento, Chris Smith, Srdjan Spasojevic, Timo Tjahjanto, Andrew Traucki, Nacho Vigalondo, Jake West, Ti West, Ben Wheatley, Adam Wingard, Anders Wulffmorgenthaler, and Yudai Yamaguchi. You no doubt counted that list and saw 26 filmmakers. You also noticed that two of them are a filmmaking pair, which means they still need one more to complete the series. That’s where you come in. This is your chance to have your name next to the guy that made A Serbian Film on a film’s credit sequence. Drafthouse Films is hosting an open short film competition to choose the last director where contestants will choose their own word (starting with the Letter T (my money’s on “Trebuchet”)) and craft a short based on it. Entries will be whittled down to a final 10 by a public voting system, and the winner will be chosen by the directors listed above. There’s no entry fee, and it’s open from now until October 1st at midnight PST. Grab your camera. Get started.

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published: 11.26.2014
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published: 11.26.2014
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published: 11.21.2014
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published: 11.21.2014
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