Hostages

AHS

Now that the seemingly months-long summer session of the Television Critics Association press tour (or just the “TCAs,” if you’re feeling the need for brevity) has finally concluded, it’s time to check back in with the television-centric conference for another look at recently-announced projects we’re actually eager to see. Around the tour’s midpoint, we explored eight new titles introduced at the TCAs that we would like to see, oh, right about now. With the back half of the tour including talking head panels from networks like CBS, The CW, Showtime, Hulu, Fox, FX, Disney, and PBS, it certainly seemed as if there would be plenty to get pumped up about when it comes time to gather around your small screen, but the pickings do seem awful slim. Perhaps it’s hard for us to get excited about a predictable string of half-hour comedies that feature both fantastic comedic talent and tired fart jokes, and maybe we’re already burnt out on historical offerings after the first half of the tour, but the last few days at the TCAs haven’t rolled out too much to get jazzed about. At the very least, the stuff we’re excited about is all very, very different, and if we’re struck by television-based ennui, we can attempt to get out of it by thinking about the surprising width of new offerings, even if they’re not very deep. And, hey, we might finally watch American Horror Story this year. (And maybe even some new stuff.)

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I have two fears that have plagued me for years. One involves peanut butter, my dog, and a Kathy Griffin-induced priapism. That’s probably the less likely of the two. The second though is grounded in reality and involves the terrifying concept of home invasions. Kidnapped is not about a mutt licking peanut butter off of an erect penis. But it is about the sudden violence inherent in being the victim of a home invasion. A family is held hostage, restrained, and terrorized, and it’s the kind of seemingly random event that could happen to anyone. It makes for an incredibly suspenseful and tense affair that takes the audience into a brutal but rewarding nightmare… at least until the final sixty seconds when the filmmakers take a giant shit on the audience’s collective face.

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taking-of-pelham-1-2-3

The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 is basically Deja Vu 2: Pelham 1 2 3, but that’s not such a bad thing.

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published: 12.23.2014
B+
published: 12.22.2014
C-
published: 12.19.2014
A-


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