Flash Gordon


On this week’s episode, in honor of the upcoming X-Men flick, Cargill and I mount our own exploration into alternate timelines as part of a new recurring series we’ve dubbed Movies of Future Past. For the inaugural foray, we imagine a universe in which George Lucas had actually acquired the rights to Flash Gordon and made that his 1977 sci-fi opus instead of Star Wars. It’s one of cinema’s most intriguing What If’s. Heck, as it stands, Lucas’ fascination with the Flash Gordon serials of the ’30s actually ended up informing so much of what Star Wars became. But that’s in this dimension, where history books have facts and whatnot. It’s far more entertaining to travel to other timelines where we’re confined only to the limits of our wild speculations!!! You should follow Brian (@Briguysalisbury), Cargill (@Massawyrm), and the show (@Junkfoodcinema). Download Episode #12 Directly


Sam Jones and Timothy Dalton in Flash Gordon

With Star Wars heading back to theaters, it’s only natural that Flash Gordon follow suit. Ironically, it was the 1930s Flash Gordon serial that was a big influence on George Lucas, whose Star Wars movies then seemed to have an influence on the release of the campy Flash Gordon feature in 1980. This time, though, another adaptation of Alex Raymond’s sci-fi comic strip will be more tied to the Star Trek franchise. According to The Hollywood Reporter, hot new screenwriters J.D. Payne and Patrick McKay, who worked on the next Trek installment, have been hired to script this other reboot. They’re working off a treatment by George Nolfi (The Adjustment Bureau), who’ll be producing with John Davis, of Predator, Waterworld and Norbit fame. That sounds like it’s in decent hands, though maybe hands that are too serious. And a Flash Gordon movie that’s taken seriously is going to be hard to accept unless it is outstanding in a totally new way. Many of us are just too fond of how the last version was done (with some of us also fans of the cheesy serials) to see the appeal in something that’s not at least a little tongue-in-cheek. Plus, Sam Jones’s recent cameo in Ted, with full-on Flash Gordon homage, was only another reminder of the property’s association with the most awesome kind of silliness. 



Continuing a yearly tradition that began at the defunct movie blog Spout, this is my 5th annual list of mostly original yet highly unlikely Halloween costume ideas. You can take any of these suggestions if you want, especially if you want to avoid having the same outfit as another person at the party you attend, and particularly if you want something that needs a lot of explanation — these tend to be good conversation starters for people looking for excuses to hit on you. Mostly, though, the following ideas are not to be taken too seriously. Some are really just stupid jokes. But they’re primarily intended to visually remind us of some of the trends, criticisms, immediate icons and zeitgeist of the past year in film. For instance, last year‘s “Forrest Gump wearing an X-Men uniform” costume illustrated 2011’s penchant for Gump-like revisionist history in blockbuster movies. And back in 2008, there was a costume called “Nuke the Fridge.” Sadly, in looking over 2012 for this year’s ideas, I realized that it’s been a very weak year for movie references worth calling back. Where are this year’s “nuke the fridge,” Antichrist fox, “Why cookie Rocket?” and “Winklevi”? Before too long, I might need to spin-off a TV version of this tradition to make it easier on me and more interesting to readers. Because we all know film culture is dead anyway, right?  


Drinking Games

If you’ve had a chance to see Seth MacFarlane’s Ted in the theaters, you have been introduced to the awesomeness that is the 1980 film Flash Gordon. Of course, all of us cool kids have already seen the movie many times before, and the coolest (read as: oldest) of us actually saw it in the theaters. If you haven’t seen Flash Gordon yet, then shame on you. How could you let this glorious camp masterpiece slip you by? You need to watch it and broaden your cinematic mind. If you have already seen it, then revisit it on DVD or Blu-ray because we can all use a little more Flash in our lives.



Seth McFarlane needs to run a tighter ship because details are starting to leak out about his upcoming feature film Ted. Flash Gordony details. Secret informants have told Flixist that Ted makes several references to the 1980 version of the intergalactic epic. They’ve even recreated one of the vehicles from that film and have gotten Sam J. Jones to sign on and make a cameo.  What does the 80s version of Flash Gordon have to do with a film about a Teddy Bear come to life? You’ve got me, but it sounds like this movie is going to have all sorts of crazy crap in it. For those uninitiated, Ted is the story of a young boy who wishes that his stuffed bear would come to life and be his friend for real. Though the wish is granted, the results are not what the kid expects. The boy grows up to be Mark Wahlberg, and the bear grows up to be still a living stuffed animal that just won’t go away. To make that situation sound even weirder, those anonymous tipsters have tipped that Ted also works in a convenience store. Filming was done recently on a scene where Ted takes a lady back into the storeroom and gives her the business end of his fluffy package. How the logistics of a stuffed bear working at a convenience store or sexing up a lady work out is a mystery to me, but then again this is a movie that has […]



Welcome back to that thing the title line said it is! Well another year has passed and you’ve wasted dozens of Fridays scarfing down bad movies until your eyeballs cry out for mercy. Good for you! When Master Chief Neil Miller asked me to a be a part of the Film School Rejects 2010 Year in Review, I cursed him for making me put forth some modicum of effort. I mean honestly, how could I possibly choose my 10 favorite Junkfood Cinema entries when I don’t feel any of them are worth celebrating? So instead, I’ve decidedly to launch what will surely not become a yearly tradition: The Junkfood Cinema Awards. Prepare yourselves…for The Junkies!



Welcome back to Junkfood Cinema; it’s a miracle! This is the weekly column wherein I gleefully besmirch the good name of Film School Rejects by loving up a truly terrible film right before the innocent, impressionable eyes of their readers. I will pick apart exactly what makes the film so stinky and also why I would gladly bask in its pungent aroma. Sound appetizing yet? Well wait until you get to act three! That’s where I pair the film with an appropriate snack food designed to unfavorably affect your physique in the same fashion in which the film affects your brain. Today’s film is the universally awful Flash Gordon.


Blu-rays Worth Buying

June was a rough month for This Week in Blu-ray. Only a few of you actively missed it, judging by the emails, but I’m sure that even more of you felt a hole in your very souls due to the lack of weekly Blu-ray buying advice. By my count I am four weeks behind as of today, four weeks that each had worthy releases — some of which you may have purchased already. So in an effort to be brief, I’ve selected the most prominent releases and mixed them in with the Blu-rays hitting shelves this week. It’s my way of smashing four weeks of release together and wiping away the blood. In the end, it should give you a good road map for what you should have been doing all along.



What’s new this week? How about re-issues of two Roger Corman classics? A fantastic drama about depression and post-suicide (attempt) dating? A Thai cattle-herder who rides around on rockets? Hot Asian nurses who kill one of their own then find themselves haunted by her ghost? And Andy Griffith.



Early this morning — about 10 am, which is early to any movie blogger — I sat down with director Breck Eisner to talk about The Crazies. It was a unique situation for both of us. I had spent 4 of the last 12 hours of my life running a crash-course on the 27-year existence of The Crazies, watching both George Romero’s 1973 original and Eisner’s remake seemingly back-to-back. For Eisner, today is opening day.


Many dedicated convention goers will attend Comic-Con 2008 simply for the merch booths. Come on. Why leave the holiest of tombs without any loot?



The Universal Day of the Jedi is this Sunday, May 25. Officially started last year on the 30th anniversary of the release of A New Hope, The Universal Day of the Jedi is a celebration of everything Star Wars, from the original movies to the general fandom surrounding the series.


Some of you may not realize this, but if it were not for a 1930’s comic strip called Flash Gordon, there’s a possibilty that the genius and legacy that is Star Wars wouldn’t exist today.

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published: 01.29.2015
published: 01.28.2015
published: 01.28.2015
published: 01.28.2015

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