Detention

The Best Horror Movies of 2012

Another year has come and mostly gone and hundreds, if not thousands, of young, stupid, misbehaving teenagers have been lost at the hands of ghosts, apparitions, psychos, monsters, animals, and families with strange murder dynamics. Like any responsible site, it’s now our job to look back on a year of cinematic chaos and movie madness and sort all of this into an easy digestible list full of horrors! And family films! Because really, 2012 in horror wasn’t all that violent, but it was reflective and satisfying in a familiar way. Onward!

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Joseph Kahn‘s new movie Detention is essentially The Breakfast Club meets Prom Night meets the kitchen sink. A group of diverse high-schoolers are stalked by a serial killer named Cinderhella, and the terror culminates during their collective stay in after school detention. The film is far from a straight forward thriller though as Kahn plays with the medium in different ways and fills the story with crazy distractions like time travel, homages to The Fly, grizzly bears and more. It’s pretty nuts. Detention was released earlier this week, and if you haven’t picked it up yet we have some good news. We’re giving away a copy of the film on Blu-ray and another on DVD. And because we care how you look in public we’re also throwing in a Detention t-shirt, beanie and baseball cap (pics below). Keep reading to see how you can win!

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This Week in DVD

Welcome back to This Week In DVD! Lots of new releases to choose from, but sadly, most of them are better left unwatched. As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it. The Weight of the Nation Americuh! This should come as news to no one, but the United States is full of fatties. Almost 70% of Americans are technically overweight or obese, and the causes for this are as numerous as ice cream flavors. The people themselves are ultimately responsible of course, but corporations, schools, and government inaction are equally culpable. This devastating HBO doc is broken into four parts: Consequences, Choices, Children In Crisis and Challenges. It looks at the problem from all sides identifying causal factors and their eventually deadly outcomes, and in a perfect world it would be mandatory viewing for classrooms and households alike.

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What is Movie News After Dark? It’s a nightly movie news column that sometimes diverges off the path of cinema and into other forms of entertainment, such as Broadway musicals, art, politics, television or even Werner Herzog doing a reading of a filthy children’s book. Yes, that’s happening. Stay tuned. Who should step in and direct The Expendables 2 if Sly Stallone isn’t up for the job? How about Con Air director Simon West? Ruminate on that a bit, dear friends.

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Detention appears to be built from the ground up as a movie whose detractors will inevitably be told that they “just don’t get it.” A hyper-stylized, post-modern teen slasher of sorts, the movie mixes an incredibly self-aware attitude with onscreen text and graphics, a shattered fourth wall, a confused mash-up of 80s and 90s homage, time travel, suspected bestiality, Hoobastank, suicide bombers, Fraggle Rock, and more. It also claims to be a comedy.

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South By Southwest has already begun heating up, but there are still plenty of movies and buckets of Schlitz to go. If you’re in Austin right now, you’re probably puzzling day to day over what you’re going to see. If you’re not in Austin, you’re probably still wondering what might escape the confines of the festival to see theaters near you. Although there’s no guarantee (except for a few big names we already know will see theaters), here are the hot tickets that might just earn themselves distribution deals. Our intrepid SXSW patrol (comprised of Adam Charles, Jack Giroux, Rob Hunter, Neil Miller, Luke Mullen and Brian Salisbury) have put together a list of what they’re most looking forward to for your reading and viewing pleasure. Keep in mind, there are over 250 movies playing this year, so this represents only a small amount of the quality programming. These are the movies that stand out even amongst the best of the best at the fest. Check it out for yourself:

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So you’ve eaten at Pita Pit and Best Wurst (because there’s nothing wrong with two lunches) and you’re scoping out theaters ready to get more movies on, but you have no idea what you’re going to see. That teary indie drama or that ridiculous sci-fi comedy? You don’t know do you? And you can’t figure it out on your own for some reason. Fortunately, we’ve created this handy guide to help you in your time of duress. Use it wisely. There’s no chance it’ll send you to the porno theater across the highway, so if you end up there, it’s on you.

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There is a lot going on in the trailer for Joseph Kahn’s Detention. It’s got hipsters. It’s, apparently, got aliens. A high school killing spree. And, most importantly, Dane Cook as a school principle. Obviously, it’s a fairly overstuffed and messy trailer, but everything this trailer hints at could make for pure cinematic gold. The director of Torque bringing aliens and hipsters together in one movie could be magical. Who doesn’t like seeing hipsters suffer bloody and brutal deaths? In the movies, of course. It’s the joyful type of bloodshed we rarely get to see on the big screen. The last half of the trailer really picks up and finds a smooth groove. Hopefully the film is as balls to the wall as the trailer is selling it as. In almost 2 weeks time, we’ll get confirmation at its SXSW premiere. There’s promise in this trailer, and I cant wait to see whether or not Kahn managed to deliver a worthy followup to his hilarious motorcycle epic.

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There are 130 films this year at Austin’s SXSW, and 60 of them being world premieres. When you scroll down the list of the films showing there, 99% of them you’ve never heard of before. Only a handful stick out that you actually know about or have eagerly (or mildly…) been anticipating. The films at the fest that currently are the most exciting for us are also the most high profile. That’s not to say there won’t be far superior little known flicks playing there – there most definitely will be – but the big ones showing are always the early attention grabbers. We’ll be running a bigger and more comprehensive list of SXSW must-sees closers to the fest, which is basically when we’ll have more info on the films there that aren’t being released by Universal or Summit. But as of right now, here are a few features that already got our excitement on high. As for those of you interested right now in knowing more about those 130 films, check out the full list here.

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