Chace Crawford

Pregnancy and childbirth are nothing new. In fact, there are few things less new than humans reproducing. It’s been done before. But Kirk Jones’ What to Expect When You’re Expecting accurately captures the inherent selfishness of expecting parents,and their individual “journeys” to the delivery room (and beyond). Unfortunately, even when gifted with a large, mostly eager cast, Jones is also saddled with a script from Shauna Cross and Heather Hach (working off of Heidi Murkoff‘s guidebook of the same name) that is deeply uninterested in providing much variety in their work. The effect is simple one – the film itself is deeply uninteresting. While What to Expect continually reminds its viewers that pregnancy and childbirth are miracles, unique and thrilling gifts, Cross and Hach have concocted one of the most bland, basic, and unadventurous scripts in recent memory.

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gossipgirl-304

Dan falls for Vanessa’s new roommate, who’s more than she appears. Blair, at her wit’s end over her lack of progress in NYU social circles, receives a report that Jenny is attempting to dismantle the hierarchy at Constance, prompting her to rush back to her old fiefdom in its defense.

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gossip-girl-s3

Due to college work kicking my ass over the last month, I’m rolling this week’s and last week’s “Gossip Girl” reviews into one big (late) bundle of joy for your reading pleasure…

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gossipgirl-s3e1

We return to the world of Gossip Girl and her subjects as summer is drawing to a close, with the gang reflecting on the events of the season.

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gossipgirl

The upper echelons of Manhattan teenage society have returned to television, so play some catch up and refresh your memory of who’s bitchy and who’s extra bitchy.

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gossip-girl-goodbye

It’s Graduation day and the gang’s all here. When Gossip Girl dismisses Serena as irrelevant, she launches an all-out attack on the cyberland big brother, vowing to discover her (or his) identity.

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chace-crawford-old-navy-01

Will the remake of Footloose also be a giant lead up to a music video? Will Kenny Loggins be informed?

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The gang complete their journey through high school with the time-honored rite of passage – attending Prom.

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Serena and the gang come together in an attempt to take down Poppy, but Lily has other plans. Meanwhile, Rufus discovers that Lily may be just like her mother after all, leading him to reconsider popping that all-important question.

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gossip-girl-southern-gentlemen

When Blair and Chuck notice inaccuracies in Gabriel’s version of how he met Serena, a confrontation is ensured.

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gossip-girl-saderanything

Relationships get more complex this week as Serena returns from Spain a (possibly) married woman, while Blair’s attempts to solidify her place in life and society almost destroy her relationship with Nate.

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gossip-girl-remainsofj

Serena attempts to prove to herself and the world that she’s not stuck in a rut when she overrules Jenny’s wishes and throws her a spectacular sweet sixteen. Nate decides that he and Vanessa have come to an end, but not before she learns of his renewed friendship with Blair.

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gossip-girl-grandfather

Blair tries to destroy the remnants of her old life in an effort to free herself from the pain of its loss. Despite her repeated brush offs, Chuck refuses to give up on the idea of a life with her, but it seems that some aspects of the past have a certain charm which he lacks.

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gossip-girl-age-of-dissodance

As the students of Constance and St. Jude’s perform “The Age of Innocence” as their final year school play, life begins to imitate art. After her dream of attending Yale is shattered, Blair’s drive for revenge alienates her from all her friends and acolytes.

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gossipgirl-carnalknowledge

Gossip Girl strikes again, as rumors surrounding Ms. Carr’s relationship with a student hit the headlines. Drastic punishment is meted out when Blair’s part in this rumor is discovered, but some new evidence throws the case into a different light.

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gossip-girl-header

Serena gets accepted into Yale. Dan gets accepted into Yale. Blair… does not get into Yale?

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Dan dodges Serena in a bid to keep from lying to her, but unfortunately his antics catch the attention of Gossip Girl and her followers.

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FSR

Kevin Carr looks at the slate of films in theaters this week with the FSR Report Card.

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Gossip Girl: Chuck in Real Life

Vanessa uses the scandalous picture of Catherine and Marcus to blackmail Blair into being a nicer person, so Blair seeks revenge by enticing Chuck to seduce Vanessa.

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Blake Lively in Gossip Girl

Dan and Serena’s love affair may be over but their roller-coaster ride of highs and lows continues.

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published: 12.23.2014
B+
published: 12.22.2014
C-
published: 12.19.2014
A-


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