The A-Team

Non-lethally (mostly) blasting their way into theaters this past weekend, The A-Team blew up around $25 million worth of sales, hardly the explosive opening they wanted.  Competing, albeit indirectly, against other summer superteams including The Losers and later, The Expendables, some heavy expectations were laid about this team and Bradley Cooper’s abdominals.  While it may not be shattering box office records, The A-Team is good summer fun.  How good? Well I found 10 things I like, and only 5 I didn’t.

10 Things I Liked

10. The Cameos

If you didn’t stay past the credits, you missed out on some cameos from the original cast members, which is a nice way of paying respect to those that came before.

9. Mindless Fun

The A-Team puts the mindless in mindless fun.  From start to finish it’s pretty much action, with tons of fireballs, bullets, and nothing to make you think that hard.

8. Weapons Handling. Plot wise it might not be the deepest film ever, but when it comes to weapons handling, everyone is actually doing it correctly.  Now, that realism stops as soon as you use a tank’s main cannon to fly a tank through the air, but their shooting was pretty realistic.

7. BA’s Fear of Flying

Anyone who’s seen the original knows that BA has a fear of flying which didn’t really make sense for an Ex-Special Forces badass, but this incarnation does a pretty good job of showing why.

6. Sequel Potential

If the box office catches up to the budget, this A-Team would make for a great franchise.

5. Bradley Cooper’s Abs

I mean, as Kanye would say “No Homo” but come on. Dude was ripped. That’s dedication.

4. Sharlto Copley

I was torn on whether or not I liked his performance as it was kind of all over the place (explained by fans as “he’s crazy!”) but in the end, he was responsible for a lot of great laughs.  Can’t wait to see him in more.

3. Insane Action

While it strains the brain to come to grips with just how a pair of rockets that realistically might not even puncture a ship (Somali pirates have hit tankers repeatedly to no avail) could result in the summer’s biggest explosion, it’s fun to watch.  Also add to the “fun to watch” list: throwing a man out a window and catching him with a helicopter skid.

2. Liam Neeson

Thanks to Taken, Neeson is bordering on becoming the world’s next hottest action star, an impressive feat considering he turned 58 last week.

1. “I Love It When a Plan Comes Together”

If that line was out of the film, I would have personally burned down a studio.  The A-Team managed to bring in a lot of laughs, some great action, and plenty of nods to the original.

The A-Team

5 Things I Didn’t Like

5. No Death Policy

While it’s not completely true, considering a handful of people are killed (though the vast majority are killed by fire from their own team) the Rangers don’t teach you to shoot tires, they teach you to shoot faces. If The A-Team went up against The Losers or The Expendables, all the tricks in the world don’t make you bulletproof.

4. Jessica Biel’s Acting

Listen, having Jessica Biel in your movie is better than not having her. But she did not pull off her hard-ass investigator role very well.  I’m in love with the girl and even I was shaking my head.

3. Flying the Tank

So I need to have five things I didn’t like or the article needs a new title. I’m putting this here not because it was all that bad, but because it was perhaps the most unrealistic part of the entire movie.  Hitting the water, in a tank, at that speed, would kill everyone.  Or, at the very least, flood the engine, leaving them stranded and eventually dead on the bottom of a lake.

2. The Arab

Biggest spoiler of the article here. The “mysterious Arab” is pretty mysterious in photos, but once they show a live shot of him, he’s instantly recognizable.  So I knew who the bad guy was a full 20 minutes before the ‘big reveal.’ Kind of lame.

1. Flashbacks

Flashbacks are pretty lazy even when used correctly, but in this film they would remind you of things that happened roughly 8 minutes earlier.

In summation friends, The A-Team is worth your time.


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