Iron Man Tells Kevin Carr to Stuff It?

I just got back from a relatively short road trip with our illustrious Executive Editor Neil Miller. That meant more than four hours in a car with him and non-stop talk about Iron Man. Here’s a sample of our conversation:

NEIL: Iron Man is going to be awesome.
KEVIN: Sure.
NEIL: You must admit that Iron Man is going to be awesome.
KEVIN: Yeah, whatever.
NEIL: Iron Man will be the greatest movie ever made in the history of the world.
KEVIN: Uh… okay.
NEIL: Bow down and worship Iron Man!
KEVIN: I’m in a car right now.
NEIL: You will kneel before Iron Man!
KEVIN: Look, I’m sure it’s going to be a great movie…
NEIL: I would totally make out with Jon Favreau.
KEVIN: [long, uncomfortable pause] Can we stop at McDonalds?

This exchange reminded me of Neil’s Editor’s Blog in which even he admitted that the hype behind Iron Man has reached epic proportions. After all, he has so many production stills and video clips on his computer that he could assemble an entire movie with them. All he needs is a kick-ass soundtrack, which I’m sure he already has from the Iron Man hype.

With 70 hi-res production stills, a dozen video clips and more than 100 pages on this site alone devoted to Iron Man, I have only one thing to say…

What the fuck?

I’m looking forward to Iron Man kicking off the summer movie season as much as the next fanboy. But this is getting out of hand. There’s no way the film is going to live up to its hype.

The summer movie season now starts on the first weekend of May. I remember when we had to wait until Memorial Day for this. And I will admit that the studios are rolling out some awesomely anticipated films this summer. Iron Man is just the beginning.

Early reviews for the film have leaked, and the consensus of those is that Iron Man is pretty sweet, but not without its flaws. But unless the movie induces to a two-hour continuous orgasm, there’s no way they’re going to be as awesome as we’re being led to believe.

Let’s take a deep breath, people.

With that said, I can’t wait for the summer movie season to start.

Sound Off: Will Iron Man be the cinematic equivalent of a two-hour continuous orgasm?


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