Will Helen Mirren Offer To Wash Russell Brand’s Junk In ‘Arthur’ Remake?

The actual line from Arthur is “Perhaps you would like me to come in there and wash your dick for you, you little shit.” It’s funny because it’s spoken to Dudley Moore by Sir John Gielgud. But Helen Mirren saying it to Russell Brand in a remake? That’s just all kinds of wrong and sexy.

But it may just happen.

Russell Brand has been attached to a remake of the classic eighties comedy for a while now, and if you’ve seen him in anything, anything at all, then you know he’s perfectly suited for the role. Arthur Bach is a filthy rich drunk living off family money without a care in the world. The closest thing he has to a friend is his man-servant, Hobson. Arthur’s rude, obnoxious, constantly inebriated, and set to inherit his own billions. The only requirement is his participation in an arranged marriage to a woman meant to return class and respectability to the family name. Arthur goes along with the plan until he meets a poor, working stiff woman and falls in love. Drunken hilarity ensues. And penis washing.

Per Variety, the role of Hobson is being reworked for saucy British minx, Helen Mirren. This is a fantastic choice because beyond Mirren’s overall brilliance and odd sexual attractiveness the woman should be an unrelentingly sharp foil for Brand’s shenanigans. Brand’s love interest hasn’t been cast yet (but I’m pulling for an Elizabeth Banks type, or better yet, Elizabeth Banks). The remake will be directed by Jason Winer, which is also inspiring news because he directed the pilot for one of the best new shows of the season, ABC’s “Modern Family.”

What do you think of Helen Mirren washing Russell Brand’s giblets? And of her taking over for John Gielgud?

Rob is the Chief Film Critic of Film School Rejects. He doesn't eat cheese on weekdays.

Read More from Rob Hunter
Get Film School Rejects in your email. All the cool kids are doing it:
Previous Article
Next Article
Reject Nation
Leave a comment
Comment Policy: No hate speech allowed. If you must argue, please debate intelligently. Comments containing selected keywords or outbound links will be put into moderation to help prevent spam. Film School Rejects reserves the right to delete comments and ban anyone who doesn't follow the rules. We also reserve the right to modify any curse words in your comments and make you look like an idiot. Thank You!