You may not have heard about it yet, but there is a hilarious and equally disturbing “R-Kelly moment” in the new film The Forbidden Kingdom. And while this would normally be considered vulgar and obscene by some, I realized how often these moments appear in mainstream movies.
Brings a new meaning to the term, “You’re in the movies.” (Say that fast out loud, and you’ll get my point.)
So, partly because these things make me giggle and partly because no one else in their right mind would compile a list like this, I humbly submit the Top Ten Urination Scenes in Movie History.
10. The Forbidden Kingdom (2008) – The film is hardly (and will probably never be) a classic, but I got a chuckle out of it. I don’t want to drop any spoilers here, but check the movie out this weekend, and you’ll see what I mean.
9. The Aviator (2004) – Leo does a number on the whole Howard Hughes legend. While his dementia didn’t consume him until later in life, the guy is almost as famous for peeing in jars as he is for flying the Spruce Goose.
8. TIE: History of the World: Part I (1981) and Major League (1989) – Mel Brooks knows his bathroom humor, and his take on the world’s first art critic is equally as funny as Major League’s Lou Brown showing his true opinion of Roger Dorn’s prima donna contract.
7. TIE: Fight Club (1999) and War of the Roses (1989) – There are some things to be learned from movies, and that is to avoid the lobster bisque wherever Tyler Durden is working and to not have the fish at Kathleen Turner’s dinner parties.
6. The Exorcist (1973) – In this film, we learned that demonic possession can lead to many things, like spitting up pea soup, crucifix masturbation and peeing on the carpet.
5. Greystoke: The Legend of Tarzan Lord of the Apes (1984) – This film was a rather stuffy look at the pulpy Tarzan legend, but that doesn’t mean it won’t stoop to one ape peeing on another.
4. The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad (1988) – If you can get past the murdering O.J. Simpson in the semi-hero role, you’ll find a lot to laugh at while Leslie Nielsen lets it all go while he’s still miked in a press conference.
3. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997) – All I have to say here is… “Evacuation Complete!”
2. Team America: World Police (2004) – Sure, the famous golden shower sequence was not shown in theaters, but it’s available on the unrated DVD. Who knew puppets could be so nasty.
1. Troll 2 (1990) – It’s an obscure movie, sure, but it’s also an unforgettable scene. How else are you going to keep a family from eating food infested by the goblins from Nilbog?
Strange Brew (1983) – Although not actually shown on screen, we can only imaging how Bob McKenzie put out the fire.
True Lies (1994) – The otherwise respectable Bill Paxton shows his true machismo when threatened by Arnie.