As a woman, there are certain things I am expected to always want – chocolate, shoes, bad boys, and more Sex and the City. As a human being with eyes, ears, a heart, and passable taste, there is one thing I will never want – more Sex and the City.
The seminal HBO series, based on Candace Bushnell’s book of the same name, ran for six years and ninety-four episodes. It is single-handedly responsible for the unearned fame of a bad cupcake place in the Village, the use of the term “Post-It breakup” in pop culture vernacular, and the predilection of some women to get drunk on pink vodka-based beverages and scream that they are “a Carrie!” or “a Charlotte!” or “a Samantha, hahaha, because I am a skank!” It was a movement, people, its own cultural zeitgeist. It spawned two feature films, the second of which was so poorly received critically that it essentially stopped any and all plans for a third film (if we are lucky enough).
So if you can’t go forward, how about going back? For whatever reason, chatter about a prequel version of the series and film has been raging on for months now. Because there is nothing people need to see more than how four emotionally damaged women became so emotionally damaged in their teen years.
But Michael Patrick King, who was executive producer and showrunner for the series and who also wrote and directed both of the nightmarish feature films the series spawned, has no interest in participating in a Sex and the City prequel in any way shape or form. King told a grateful audience at a TCA panel for his newest show about ladies looking for love and cheap cowboy boots and Botox or whatever it is that women like, 2 Broke Girls:
“I’m not working on any Sex and the City prequel at all…I haven’t read Candace’s Bushnell’s books…My Carrie Bradshaw started at 33 and I took her to 43 — I don’t even want to know who Carrie Bradshaw’s parents are…the idea of going backward, making her less evolved, is something that I can’t even imagine doing. I have no connection to the prequel.”
However, as heartening as that vehement statement from King is, it also highlights one major hurdle in the path to never, ever seeing anything SATC on screen ever, ever, please God, ever again – there is existing prequel material. Bushnell has already penned two prequel novels as part of a new series, The Carrie Diaries, and there is surely more where that came from.
Some truly twisted individual has already compiled a list of “first choice” picks to take up the ladies’ roles (I could use the term “slip into the ladies’ Louboutins” here, but I have self-respect) should those books hit the screen. That list imagines a world where Blake Lively, Selena Gomez, Emma Roberts, and Elizabeth Olsen would take over for the original quartet, and I’m sorry, I just had a stroke. I don’t even have a particular affection for the original series and still, still this offends me.
Of course, a Carrie Diaries film or series could happen, and of course King’s involvement would not be necessary for such violence to be committed against audiences, but this news helps a tiny, tiny bit.
Would you want to see a Sex and the City prequel? If so, why? No, really, WHY GOD WHY?