News

They’re Back: Sex and the City Returns

sex-header1

Just when you thought you were safe from the Sex and the City women, they’re back. They’re back like the shark in Jaws, Chucky, Jason, Freddie and every other scary character who haunts the cinema. Still I have to see it from the fans point of view and agree that there’s material for the material girls from NYC. This is what I believe will happen to Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha in Sex and the City: The Devil’s Spawn.

Samantha will get a sex change. Yes, the woman who always boasted of having sex like a man becomes a man. It is a logical progression to her story. How could it be more natural than Sam putting her money where it counts, not only going for the change but giving money to research to make sure it’s satisfyingly complete.

But what about Carrie and Big? With the economic downturn Big cannot bear to tell Carrie that he’s invest all of their money with Bernie Madoff.  They’re broke. How can Big tell Carrie it’s no more Dolce, Dolce, Dolce, but  Keds, Keds, Keds?  Unable to share this horrible news Big will sell his soul to the Devil or more precisely he’ll lend Carrie’s uterus.

They move into the Dakota, you know that spooky old apartment building where the exteriors of a certain horror film was shot in 1968.  They meet a mysterious couple played by Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon. They ply Carrie with Manhattans, anti nuke literature and trips to upscale shoe stores.

Before you can say “Give Big a cigar” , Carrie will have Satan’s child who will be named Gabbana.

I don’t want to reveal much more, except to say that Charlotte finds she’s attracted to the newly male Sam(antha) and contemplates leaving Harry. And Miranda? Can’t say. It’s just too good.

Why is this sequel being made? Let me think. Oh, I know. Because the first film was a big success and made lots and lots and lots of money. And checking on the message board at IMDB there are people, okay mostly women, who are really wanting some more time with the fab four.

Oh, one more plot twist. Sam Jones marries Ivanka Trump, breaking poor Charlotte’s heart.

New Line plans to have the film in theaters in 2010. Just in time for the year of the tiger. Nope, there’s no year of the cougar.

Robin Ruinsky has been a writer since penning her autobiography in fourth grade. Along the way she's studied theater at Syracuse University, worked with Woody Allen starring most of the time on the cutting room floor. A segue into the punk rock scene followed but writing was always the main focus. She writes for various crafty, artsy magazines about people who make craftsy, artsy collectible things. But her first love is writing fiction and film criticism which some people think are the same thing.

Read More from Robin Ruinsky
Get Film School Rejects in your email. All the cool kids are doing it:
Previous Article
Next Article
Reject Nation
8 Comments
Leave a comment
Comment Policy: No hate speech allowed. If you must argue, please debate intelligently. Comments containing selected keywords or outbound links will be put into moderation to help prevent spam. Film School Rejects reserves the right to delete comments and ban anyone who doesn't follow the rules. We also reserve the right to modify any curse words in your comments and make you look like an idiot. Thank You!