Shia LaBeouf Wants to Force You to Watch ‘Indiana Jones 5’

Remember how much everybody loved Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and how fandom has been clamoring for further father/son bonding adventures between Indy and Sia Labeouf’s Mutt ever since it left theaters? Me either, so why are all the cast members of that film going around talking to MTV cameras about another sequel? Probably because George Lucas and company know that no matter how bad it looks, we’ll all go and see it anyways. We can’t help ourselves; it’s a sickness. And because of that, Ford seems to be busy preparing his creaking old body for a fifth go around in the iconic Indy togs. According to Shia LaBeouf, “I talked to Harrison Ford. He said he’s staying in the gym, he said he’s heard no word, but he does know that George Lucas is out there looking for a MacGuffin. He said he’s staying in the gym, so it means the movie is not so far off.” If the amount of time it took Lucas to find a MacGuffin for Crystal Skull is any indication, then Ford may be in that gym for quite some time.

Still, this isn’t just second hand heresay; word of a fifth Indy film being in the works has even come directly from Ford’s hallowed lips themselves. When he talked to MTV he said, “It’s on George’s plate. And I’m hoping he’s working hard at it, because I’d look forward to doing it again if the three of us could get together — George, Steven Spielberg, myself — I’d love to do another.” That’s great for him, he gets to put on a fedora and hold a whip and play Indiana Jones; but what about the rest of us who actually have to watch the end results? Can we take another round of Shia LaBeouf swinging around on vines like some sort of stupid cartoon character? Ah, what’s it matter anyways? If you’ll excuse me, I’m off to the message boards to talk about how if we can just keep Lucas away from the script, and if Spielberg has been inspired enough by Super 8 to go back to making movies like he used to in the 80s, then this one might be worth watching. Fingers crossed!

Image by Gohead-Gostan

Weaned on the genre films of the 80s. Reared by the independent movement of the 90s. Earned a BA for writing stuff in the 00s. Reviews current releases at

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