Earlier today, we were shocked to learn that people die in a film called Immortals, a shock I hope you’ve all sufficiently recovered from, because I am about to knock your socks off with another slice of cinematic surprise. The latest jaw-dropper? Jason Statham is starring in a film that necessitate that he kick total ass and protect an innocent. Too much? Get ready for more – the film also involves some form of safe-cracking, and the combination of both an actual safe as plot point, paired with Statham needing to save someone, gives us one damn succinct film title. It’s called Safe. You can resume breathing now.

In Boaz Yakin‘s (Remember the Titans and, uh, Uptown Girls) perfectly titled film, Statham plays some sort of “elite agent” tasked with saving and safing (get it?). There’s also some stuff about that cute kid he needs to protect, numbers and codes, the Russian mafia, and more. Also? Statham apparently kicks a ton of ass, as this first trailer is about 90% ass-kicking and 10% numbers-running. It’s Statham at his absolute best (numbers aside). After the break, watch the trailer for Safe, which will likely assure that any male viewers will break out into cold sweats the next time they’re in a subway.

Safe will open on March 2, 2012. [Yahoo! Movies]

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