I am fully aware that I after I reveal what I am about to reveal, I may very well have my Official Lady Card revoked – but I’m willing to accept that. Deadline Harriman reveals that Ryan Murphy has signed a “preemptive deal” in the seven-figures with Sony Pictures to make a film titled One Hit Wonders, a musical comedy that will center on three washed-up pop singers from the ’90s who join together to make a super group. The film has yet to be penned, but it will be written specifically for Gwyneth Paltrow, Reese Witherspoon, and Cameron Diaz, who will play the singers, along with Beyonce, Andy Samberg, and the rest of the Lonely Island boys in unspecified (but obviously musical) roles.

Here comes the part where I throw myself onto the fire – I think this sounds eighteen shades of awful, almost unspeakably terrible. The real kicker for me is this tidbit – “The project came out of a dinner that Murphy had at the Soho House, with Paltrow, Diaz and Witherspoon. They wanted to do something fun together, and kicked around ideas until they settled on One Hit Wonders.” How I wish this had just stayed a funny jag between friends and not something that the rest of us have to be subjected to.

While musical comedies are usually delightful, something about a pack of Hollywood A-list friends getting together just for the sake of getting together turns my tummy, and the attachment of Ryan Murphy, whose Glee has become unwatchable and who has only ever directed one feature (Eat Pray Love, shudder), is enough to make me forget that I generally like Witherspoon and Samberg. Toss in Paltrow and Diaz? I’m out. One Hit Wonders will likely turn into the Girls Night Out film du jour when it hits screens, but as is, I’m out.

Murphy will direct the film, and he will co-write the script with his Glee comrades, Brad Falchuk and Ian Brennan.

While it’s currently unknown who will do actual singing in the production, we can expect that Paltrow and Witherspoon will both belt out tunes, as they’ve already done in previous productions (most notably, with Paltrow in her numerous Glee appearances and her starring role in Country Strong and Witherspoon in her Academy Award-winning role in Walk the Line). Hopefully, Diaz will not try to use her own pipes (do you remember My Best Friend’s Wedding?).


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