Robert Rodriguez has been pimping Machete on loop since the faux-trailer dropped between the two segments of Grindhouse in 2007 (well, for America anyway). And like many of you, I’d be intrigued to see certified bad-ass Danny Trejo machete up and cut his way through piles of people in search of the bastard who is presumably responsible. At least I think that’s the plot.

The last time we checked in, Machete was headed in front of the cameras at the end of July, and now that may actually happen. I know, I’m just as shocked as you. Get ready to really hold on to your brollies (umbrellas) though, as Bloody Disgusting has the skinny on who’ll be joining Trejo in the film. Michelle Rodriguez, Jonah Hill and Robert De Niro. And you thought this was B-Movie shlock. Yes, they have an inside source which also peeped them to news on the new Alien and Predators so it seems reputable. Nonetheless file this under rumor until more is known.

Personally I enjoy a good rumor, if it’s clearly marked that is, and this is a doozy. I know De Niro is a shadow of his former self, and I admit he probably won’t hit the heights of Rocky and Bullwinkle again, but we can always hope. It’s almost odder that Jonah Hill has signed on, he’s hardly been out of comedy, and I suppose he could pull the laughs in what will surely mop up at the crazy-as-shit awards later in the year. Michelle Rodriguez is no surprise, she’s so crazy she chose jail over rehab and treats speed limits as challenges. I’m beginning to think she’s part of a Bolt-like scenario and her helpers lead her from set to set telling her it’s real. In that case, keep the machetes with the other ex-con in the lead role. At least he seems to have his mental faculties.

So to sum up, Robert Rodriguez may be done prick-teasing fans, possibly taking the lead from Tarantino’s decision to make films instead of talk about them.

Wait a minute, where’s Sin City 2? Damn you Rodriguez!

What do you think? Are you ready to grab you Machete?

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