It seems like we’ve been inundated by rumors here lately, which is probably because all of the news-verification robots we own are still broken from the time Rob Hunter tried to use them as what he called “Slip N Slide Toboggans.”

Since those damned things are still waterlogged, we can only speculate as to whether the announcement by British Tabloid and known exaggerator The Mirror that Grammy-dominating R&B star Rihanna might be joining Samuel L. Jackson for the Last Dragon remake.

A film that, up until now, hasn’t existed outside an announcement that Jackson was going to try to resurrect the role.

While other sites are probably pouring over the question of whether she would be good, I’d like to ask a better question:

Does she have to be?

The original role of the Pop Star Dance Show Host Turned Love Interest was portrayed by then-pop star Vanity – the only woman that Prince never threw into a lake.

If the movie is done with any thought, it will still be as ridiculous as the original, although I don’t quite understand the interest in remaking a cult hit. Still, the role isn’t a serious one. It’s not a difficult one. All it requires is a few giggles and a dance number, and even though Rihanna will probably emote with the skill of a robot (not you, News-bot 3000), she can at least be attractive and not get in the way all that much.

That is, if any of this is true.

Or if the movie ever ends up getting made.

What do you think?


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