What is Movie News After
Dark DRINKING? It’s what happens when Neil leaves and Kate Erbland and I joke about me doing this column drunk and then don’t realize that’s probably a bad idea until the next day.
So hello and welcome to maybe the only installment ever of Movie News After Drinking, brought to you by Old Crow Bourbon. Old Crow Make it a Double! (Note: We should get paid for this). I think my introduction needs to be longer before I put that page break thing here and before I get fired for making a mockery of this column. Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance came out today and it should come as little surprise that most people hate the movie. Our boy Jack Giroux reviews the flick over at TheFilmStage where he politely points out that Jerry Springer jokes are old enough to be getting paternity tests themselves (that means they’re like 15 years old).
If you thought that (pregnant pause I am thinking really hard ) – that Will Smith’s diarrhea of a good idea I Am Legend needed a sequel, congratulations, you are either a primate or a Hollywood executive. Our acquaintances at BadassDigest report that Akiva Goldsman has been hired to make a squeakquel. Fans of the original story should continue not giving a shit, considering the first film didn’t give a shit about the source material either, to such a degree that the title stopped making any sense. Is this good news or bad news? BAD NEWS BEARS, HOMIE. Who cares? Not me. I mean, the film was actually kind of entertaining for like an hour but the ending was super stupid and the vampires were kind of like those long necked bastards from Attack of the Clones.
Because of the four day weekend (Hooray, Presidents!) Sony and BoxOfficeMojo are predicting that Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance will win the weekend regardless of quality, with an estimated $20-30 million. WE’LL SEE ABOUT THAT.
Speaking of attacking, Starz! currently has Attack the Block playing in HD, so like, check it out (note: we should get paid for this too).
Moving on, the cool minds at Mondo are celebrating the Oscars this year by doing what they do best: creating pretty righteous posters. If I did this right and there is no guarantee I did, you should be able to click on this image here and it will get like really big and be of Rango, which I hope wins for best animated feature. The other posters they have are both for Hugo, which you can check out at /Film or probably on our site at some point later I don’t know.
In response to a query from Moon director Duncan Jones, Scott Weinberg compiled a great list of Foreign Action Films over at Movies.com. I’ve seen most of what the list has to offer and feel good about telling you to check it out too. A lot of the flicks are on Netflix. The only thing I’m not sure of is how Rare Exports and Saint Nick made the list – they’re both actually really enjoyable movies, but they’re more horror than action.
As you probably have come to realize, there are a bunch of different Wizard of Oz things happening and by a bunch I mean Sam Raimi’s Oz: The Great and Powerful. Thanks to the fine folks at /Film I now also know about Dorothy and the Witches of Oz, which looks low budget and strange via this trailer, but to be honest in my drunken stupor I’m like “this is cool” and Doc Brown is in it. Check it!
Michael Fassbender, who you’ll recognize from X-Men First Class, Inglorious Basterds, or His Penis, is working with writer Ronan Bennett to craft a story about the Celtic Warrior Cuchulain, according to /Film. I’m not going to pretend to know anything about this, but apparently a lady attacks some dudes over a bull that is particularly good at fucking and making other bulls and I found this image when I searched:
So apparently Cuchulain is also the Irish Wolfhound. Based on that image alone I think I’m down to see this movie because it seems like a lot of people will get killed over something very stupid.
Coming full circle back around to Ghost Rider, cool dude and screenwriter Todd Farmer had a journal post today at his Wendago Blog about his attempt to bring Ghost Rider to the screen in the sequel. He kindly links to his treatment which was dismissed as being “too violent,” which is a shame since the studio opted to go with a movie that was “too stupid” and directors who are “too bad.” BURN NOTICE. I think Farmer and Patrick Lussier would have made a good Ghost Rider flick. In many ways Drive Angry is Ghost Rider but in a car instead of on a motorcycle and with a regular Nic Cage face instead of a flaming skull. Avi Arad was the one to pass on the project so there’s that.
I leave you tonight with a video, because it seems like that is what I’m supposed to do. I have chosen the trailer for 7500, an upcoming supernatural thriller starring True Blood’s Ryan Kwanten because I think he is awesome and I sat next to him at a screening of Safe House. Also, the cast of this movie is very attractive, except for that Entourage kid.