What is Movie News After Dark? It is not a sentient being sent to Earth to bring you nightly doses of absolute and unquestionable brilliance. It is not the wittiest chap at the tea party. It is not an ad-free experience. It is, however, a nightly gathering of entertainment news and views that works very hard to win your affection. Except for last night, when its usually diligent author felt pain so bold that it had him contemplating watching Glitter again…
Breaking tonight is the news that Seth Gordon, director of such films as The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters and Four Christmases, is now attached to direct a remake of the 1983 film WarGames. This news will undoubtedly be met with mixed reactions, as their is a delicate balance between people’s hatred for remakes and their enjoyment of the works of Seth Gordon. Which will win out? More at 11…
Heat Vision has 5 Lessons Hollywood Can Learn from Green Lantern. Missing is the one where they leave Blake Lively on the CW next time and instead cast a real actress. Also, “Be Like Marvel” is a bullshit suggestion. Lets start with “Be Interesting.”
Speaking of Marvel, their films are at the center of Todd Gilchrist’s excellent essay, Bottle Blockbusters: When Did Big Movies Get So Small? over at Movies.com. It’s ultimately a well-constructed think piece that finishes by praising Michael Bay in an almost saintly manner. Therefore, I approve.
Speaking of Michael Bay, Transformers star Shia LaBeouf is now claiming that with Transformers: Dark of the Moon, the director has crafted the ‘greatest 3-D film ever.’ We should point out, however, that it’s not unlike the time he said that Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen was “the biggest practical effects ever dealt with, or [that] have ever been done in film.” He was younger, then.
The guys and gals (are there gals?) at Screen Rant have completed the painstaking task of creating a complete character guide for Cars 2. Apparently there are a lot of characters in Cars 2, none of whom appear to be helping it avoid becoming the worst reviewed Pixar movie yet.
Speaking of Pixar, here’s the first poster for their next film Brave, which could very well bring them back to critical prominence after their done scuffing up their reputation with Cars 2. It’s not a sequel, nor is it a girl, and probably not yet a woman, but some believe that Brave will save Pixar from itself.
Speaking of animated things, TIME has listed the 25 All-Time Best Animated Films. If you don’t like clicking with your mouse, you can read the full list at First Showing. And because we’re on the internet, I have only one response: Pinocchio!? Are you f–king kidding me! This list is bullshit!
Now that Game of Thrones has finished its first season, you’re probably sad. Buck up, young squires, as the internet has an endless supply of people waiting to interpret the already interpreted with new interpretations and analysis. My favorite thus far is Game of Thrones Explained… with Beer.
Joanna Robinson and the Modern Womyn of Pajiba (who will eventually get their own section in this column, I assure you) are ready to enlighten you with 12 Movies with Disgusting Messages that We Love to Pieces, You Know, Despite Ourselves. I still see nothing wrong with Unfaithful. Diane Lane can do what Diane Lane wants.
The word went out earlier in the week that Warren Beatty is getting back into the director’s chair. Now we know who’s bi he will be opticing. His film will take on the life and times of Howard Hughes, someone we’ve heard so little about. It will have an all-star cast and if he’s lucky, it will be regarded as a medium success and he will follow it with a Best Picture winning film about the mob in Boston.
The fine comic writer Joel Watson, of Hijinks Ensue, has created this giggle-worthy ode to Doctor Who. This fulfills News After Dark’s nightly Doctor Who link requirement in all the best possible ways. You guys saw the Michael Bay stuff up top, right?
After playing a ridiculous villain in.. what was that team-up movie, again? Oh, The Losers, hyper-serious actor Jason Patric will move on to star alongside sexpot Lucy Punch in Powers, the FX-hubbed adaptation of the comic series from Brian Michael Bendis and artist Michael Avon Oeming. If no one’s commented yet on the two guys with three names who gave their comic a single word name, please let me be the first. It makes me giggle. The show sounds awesome.
Badass Digest frontman Devin Faraci has published another of his Devin’s Advocate articles, this time expounding of the meaning of the word “geek” and the death of said geekdom. It has something to do with the new Miss USA saying she’s a “history geek.” That concerns me almost as much as the “talent” she displayed in order to win the crown.
Speaking of columns, The AV Club has a new one in which they explore Secret Cinema, or movies that no one is talking about. They’re clearly not short on time up there in Illinois. That said, Keith Phipps really does do some fine work with his essay on Gas-s-s-s.
In honor of his recent shots at dead Jackass star Ryan Dunn, Ranker.com has a list of Roger Ebert’s 13 most inflammatory statements. I was previously unaware of that guy’s distaste for Cinco de Mayo. Of all the holidays, I’ve always found that one to be among the least offensive.
Speaking of things that bare being spoken about, I was not aware of this, but Weeds is coming back on Monday for its seventh season. How was I not aware of this? Anyway, here’s a video that allows you to catch up on the previous six seasons in two minutes. Seems easy enough: