What is Movie News After Dark? It’s a nightly column about movies and television and things that are said about movies and television. Sometimes it’s full of news. Sometimes it’s weird. It’s always worth reading.

We begin tonight with a fact that should be well known to readers of this column. If not, you’re not paying attention, and you should feel shame. I enjoy reading the work of Pajiba’s Joanna Robinson more than I enjoy reading my own work. Which is a lot to say, as I find myself to be downright brilliant. That said, the supremely talented Ms. Robinson has written a list all about 5 Kickass Female Characters You Wouldn’t Want to Meet in a Dark Alley – including Thor‘s Sif, as played by Jaimie Alexander and seen above. The only problem is that I want to meet all of these women in a dark alley. But not in a combative manner. Unless they’re into that sort of thing. What can I say? I’m flexible.

The folks at Geeks of Doom have a really great read about the upcoming Robocop reboot from Jose Padilha, about which I’m very excited. RoboCop: Electic Dreams and Cybernetic Wishes… is a nerdy love letter to the character and a wish list of sorts for how Mr. Padilha can make it awesome. Dead or alive, the director should read this.

In his continuing effort to cram his movies with the biggest names he can get with the smallest amount of money, Robert Rodriguez has lured Mel Gibson into the fray for Machete Kills, the sequel to the Danny Trejo led film that co-starred a post-jail Lindsay Lohan. Maybe Robby Rod can convince Gibson to get naked. That would be impressive.

Back to CinemaCon for a moment, Badass Digest’s Devin Faraci chronicles how The Dark Knight Rises in Vegas, breaking down some of the footage shown off by director Christopher Nolan. As it turns out, we still know almost nothing about what the hell is going to happen in that movie. Then again, do we really want to?

Long time FSR friend, reader and artist Hector Pahaut has sent us his own version of a poster for Ruby Sparks, the upcoming film from the filmmakers behind Little Miss Sunshine. As someone who loved the first trailer, I too was disappointed with the poster put out by the Fox Searchlight marketing interns. Hector’s is far better:

Earlier today, Warner Bros. screened some footage from Peter Jackson’s The Hobbit in a million frames per second, or something along those lines. It was met with mixed reactions. The most erudite of these mixed reactions was that of Moises Chiullan over at Ain’t It Cool. His analysis of The Hobbit at 48 Frames Per Second dives into the technical details and gives us some idea of what Peter Jackson is trying to do with his newfound toy.

The folks at Gawker have pointed out that We’ve Been Shitting on the Wrong Show, explaining that the Julia Louis Dreyfus led political comedy Veep has crushed Lena Dunham’s Girls in ratings with its premiere. It looks like the internet, despite its concerted effort to make Girls “a thing,” has failed miserably. That, or people really don’t care that much about the problems of upper-crust white girls. It has to be one of those two things.

Our own Brian Salisbury writes for Movies.com, it’s where he sends all his really good ideas. Today, he delivers his thoughts on Why The Raid‘s Gareth Evans Should Absolutely Direct Mission: Impossible 5. This follows up on my own in-progress article, Why The Raid‘s Gareth Evans Should Direct Every Action Movie Ever.

The folks at Letterboxd have announced that their wonderful site that allows users to chronicle their movie-watching addiction and create their own arbitrary lists is now public — sort of. You can now view pages on Letterboxd, but you still must be invited to be a part of the membership. Need an invite? We may just have a solution for you soon, so stay tuned.

The folks at ScreenRant have published their 2012 Summer Movie Preview. I like the guys and gals at ScreenRant, and you should too. If Film School Rejects is ever the victim of a hostile takeover by knitting enthusiasts and is forced to change format, you should go read ScreenRant in the wake of our death.

Speaking of Summer Movies, the folks at Cracked present If The Avengers Were 10 Times Manlier. Because Hulk dick punches are actually quite funny.

We close tonight with perhaps the greatest thing of all-time ever. Fans of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air will note that “The Carlton Dance” is one of the cornerstone’s of that particular show’s popularity. Which makes Alfonso Ribeiro leading a “Carlton Dance” flash mob a sign that all is right in the world. See the video below and have your life made whole.

Don’t Forget…

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