What is Movie News After Dark? It’s a wild summer romp disguised as a prestige flick. We toss together some of the news that your brain needs to hold most tightly to for fear of losing it forever. Do you dare know what can’t be unknown?

Since it’s going to be a bizarre (fiercely sexual) post tonight, we start off with the innocent pleasure of shoes. Custom painted movie shoes to be specific. For full disclosure, yes, PeregrinePaints over at Etsy is a friend of the site, but who cares? Her stuff is very cool, the work speaks for itself, and you can dictate exactly what you want painted on your kicks. Not a bad deal, especially for the super-fan who can’t understand why Nike hasn’t produced as an official El Topo sneaker yet.

Seriously, Nike. Where is the Jodorowsky line?

To kick off the sexy talk, while Gwen was writing about surprisingly sexy scenes, Teresa Jusino over at China Shop has written a tome on the many, varied, wondrous kinks of the geek. From BSG to TNG, from Buffy slaying Spike to Dr. Who and Torchwood, Jusino talks directly to self-proclaimed kinky geeks to get an idea of why role playing and geek culture can get so hot. It’s a fantastic article to read before strapping on your Jar Jar Binks costume.

Take a deep breath. Steven Spielberg and friends haven’t added CGI or digital enhancements to E.T. for its forthcoming Blu-ray release.

The good folks over at Movies.com have launched their own short film feature recently, and the latest edition takes us all the way up to sunny Canada. Sadly and inexplicably, the entry doesn’t ever mention Ashley Angel from O Town’s Dance Academy.

“I like AOL because it’s so embarrassing. People look at you as if you’re a fossil. Which you are. But I enjoy that embarrassment. I like being on the outside. Having an AOL address is like wearing Ocean Pacific shorts. It’s so uncool that it’s cool.” That’s Paul Rudd telling Playboy about how everyone in comedy seems to still have an AOL email address. So, yes, the funniest people you admire all grab their top-of-the-line Apple laptops to access their email from 1994.

In case you love UPPERCASE LETTERS, here’s Film Critic Hulk talking about action sequences. Funnier within the 140-character confines of twitter? Yes. More astute in long-form? Absolutely, but can we tear the guy’s (or gal’s) Caps Lock off the keyboard? If not, can we get a tag-team article from Hulk and a simple caveman trying to understand crane shots?

Hot off the heels of some questionable set photos, Chloe Moretz discusses the tone and feel of Tim Burton‘s Dark Shadows. Warning: the word “camp” is used. So is the phrase “horromedy.”

And here’s World War Z director Marc Forster saying what every director of a book adaptation always says about the project: “The idea, obviously the book is not written as a narrative, you try to take things from the book, but at same time you’re changing certain things,” Forster explained. “I do feel we’re trying to keep it in the spirit of the book because it’s important.” Bold words!

Yes, A Wet Dream on Elm Street is exactly what you think it is.

We close tonight with a trailer for Where’s Waldo? which should absolutely exist for the Carmen San Diego cross-over potential alone:


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