Movie News After Dark: Tom Hanks vs Somali Pirates, Captain America, Alec Baldwin, and Simon Pegg as C-3PO

What is Movie News After Dark? This is a question that I am almost never asked, but I will answer it for you anyway. Movie News After Dark is FSR’s late-night secretion, a column dedicated to all of the news stories that slip past our daytime editorial staff and make it into my curiously chubby RSS ‘flagged’ box.

It will (but is not guaranteed to) include relevant movie news, links to insightful commentary and other film-related shenanigans. I may also throw in a link to something TV-related here or there. It will also serve as my place of record for being both charming and sharp-witted, but most likely I will be neither of the two. I write this stuff late at night, what do you expect?

Editor’s Note: Neil’s knee deep in the goo of SXSW, so Nathan Adams has dutifully stepped up to deliver the news and insight you demand. Shower him with gifts in the form of Katherine Heigl DVDs.

Tonight’s header image comes from Captain America: The First Avenger, which has a new synopsis. The image, as you can see, is of a bloody lipped Cap restrained in a chair by agents of HYDRA. And the synopsis tells us about how Cap has to fight the evil forces of HYDRA and their leader The Red Skull. Oh man, if there aren’t any Nazis in this movie I’m going to be so mad.

If you’re not sure what HBO’s upcoming Game of Thrones is all about or where it came from, there’s no need to worry. When I have a question I always turn to the same source for info: Taiwanese news. This computer-animated presentation tells you everything you need to know about The Song of Ice and Fire series that HBO is adapting, the books’ author George R.R. Martin, and what his ghost will do after he dies from eating too much:

Some new images were released for Scream 4. A lot of them are pretty generic and look like they could have been pulled from any Scream movie, but one of them has a hanging body and a bunch of blood and it looks pretty brutal and awesome. Except for David Arquette looking pretty stupid in the foreground. Man I hope he gets stabbed a bunch in this one.

Last Action Hero is available to stream instantly on Netflix. This isn’t really news. It’s more something I just stumbled across that made me really happy and now I’m watching Last Action Hero while I write this. “Iced that guy, to cone a phrase.” Come back John McTiernan! I’m sorry we made fun of you!

Tom Hanks has signed on to star in a real life story about a cargo ship captain who was taken hostage by Somali pirates. It sounds pretty dramatic and harrowing. I guess my dream of getting another Bachelor Party is going to have to be put off for another couple years. Hanks is still going through this dramatic phase of his. I’m not worried. He’ll come around.

Alec Baldwin has dropped out of Men in Black III and signed on for Rock of Ages. Given this news, of course, everyone has the same question on their minds: will Baldwin dance? “No, It’s not that kind of thing. It’s not Glee, it’s rock and roll.” Damn you Baldwin.

Indie icon Richard Linklater is the top candidate to direct a remake of The Incredible Mr. Limpet. You know, that movie where Don Knotts turned into a cartoon fish and fought Nazis. I don’t remember much about that movie, other than it kind of creeped me out when I was a kid. This version will be a modern update that moves the story past WWII on the historical timeline. Mr. Limpet vs. Al Qaeda?

Freaks and Geeks vet Paul Feig tells 24 Frames that he is developing a comedy with Don Draper. You see, John Hamm has a role in Feig’s current film Bridesmaids, and apparently he was so funny in it Feig is calling him Cary Grant. Seeing as I’ve heard Hamm’s name come up about a million times this year when listening to stand-ups talk about hanging around the alt comedy scene, this doesn’t come as much of a surprise. Guy is a big, handsome nerd.

Last week it was reported by Variety that Johnny Knoxville was very close to playing Moe Howard in a Farrelly brothers directed Three Stooges movie. Now it’s being reported that he was never offered the part at all. This little hiccup has given me the moment of clarity to process just how terrible an idea having the Farrelly brothers make an updated Three Stooges movie is. Oh God, just the idea of it needs to get scrubbed out of my brain.

Finally tonight, I’m pretty hit or miss when it comes to laughing at things on College Humor. Probably it’s because I’m a decade older than a lot of college students now. When you get Nick Frost and Simon Pegg to do an Internet short, you’re pretty much guaranteed to get something funny though. Especially when they’re making fun of Star Wars, because everyone knows about Star Wars and everyone hates George Lucas.

Watch them be funny as R2 and 3PO:

Weaned on the genre films of the 80s. Reared by the independent movement of the 90s. Earned a BA for writing stuff in the 00s. Reviews current releases at

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