Movie News After Dark: Avengers Teaser, Attack the Block Slang, Jon Benjamin’s Van and Bizarro Dark Knight Trailers

What is Movie News After Dark? It certainly is not a nightly movie news column produced in someone’s mother’s basement. However, it is written by a man with a strict no-pants policy. Now please go forth and enjoy tonight’s news with that in the back of your mind.

We begin tonight with Chris Evans, Captain America, and some of his costume from The Avengers. Earlier today, Marvel Studios released a teaser for next summer’s big superhero team-up that also includes the final scene from Captain America: The First Avenger. It’s perhaps the scene you’d expect to lead us forward on this path, but if you haven’t seen Cap, then you might want to skip on down to the rest of tonight’s stories.

Olivia Wilde may play porn star Linda Lovelace, making her something in the range of the 35th actress who has shown interest in such a role. She is circling the role in Lovelace, the biopic from Howl co-directors Rob Epstein and Jeffrey Friedman. This is a project that competes with the Linda Lovelace biopic starring Malin Ackerman. It begs the question: who shall better headline Deep Throat, Ms. Wilde or Ms. Ackerman?

Kevin Smith isn’t kidding around, nor has he been for quite some time. He has gone from self-distributing shake-up man to success story to online broadcasting mogul in mere months, with the actual release of his horror flick Red State still on the table. That release, as he explained to Movieline, will now include an actor-focused Oscar campaign and qualifying LA theatrical run for Red State‘s stars. The film will also go VOD on Labor Day.

The following is the most useful thing you will have in your possession going into this weekend. First, lets all assume that you’ll be seeing Attack the Block if its playing within three states of you. Then, lets assume that you don’t speak South London slang. Now, use the following Attack the Block slang cheat sheet to interpret appropriately. Finally, enjoy it, fam.

In addition to taking her clothes off in just about everything, Paz de la Huerta is also looking to direct. She will make her own version of The Red Shoes, and oddly it seems like it will be in honor of Amy Winehouse. Says the budding director, “Look what just happened to Amy Winehouse! Maybe had she not seen so many bad pictures of herself she would have gotten more self esteem and not been so self-destructive.” I don’t think it was that so much as all the drugs in her system, but I see your point, Paz.

Over at io9, Doctor Who star Matt Smith talks about the evolution of his Doctor, and how some of his darkest moments are yet to come.

Bryan Cranston has sadly dropped out of Ruben Fleischer’s crime drama The Gangster Squad. But salvation might be at hand, as Robert Patrick will replace him as a laid-back, Texas born LAPD officer whose tenacity may spell some doom for the likes of Sean Penn.

Early posters for The Muppets were silly, leg-filled and awkward. This one is just right:

The 12th and final entry in The AV Club’s Pop Pilgrims video series is on its way, and they will be stopping by my own hometown of Cleveland, Ohio. Of this, I approve. If you’re from the area, head on over there and tell them where in Cleveland they should look for cinematic landmarks. Yes, the house from A Christmas Story is the obvious one.

Speaking of The AV Club, here’s their latest recap of Jon Benjamin Has a Van. Are you people watching this show? It leaves me soiled with laughter and yearning for more of that short, bearded, golden-voiced man. And his van.

Kathryn Bigelow will kill Osama Bin Laden in October 2012. Or something like that. Her film, Kill Bin Laden will be released by Sony on October 12, 2012. That’s assuming it is even still called Kill Bin Laden. Or that Joel Edgerton is still in the works to star. Either way, explosions!

We close tonight with the strangest damn thing I’ve seen all week, The Dark Knight Rises trailer as depicted by strange Taiwanese animation. As a wise man once said, there are no words for insanity such as this.

Neil Miller is the Founder and Publisher of Film School Rejects. For almost a decade, he has been talking movies on television, the radio, and the Internet. As of yet, no one has stopped him.

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