Movie News After Dark: Aliens, Chris Evans’ Chest, Dustin Diamond and Spider-Monster: The Musical!

What is Movie News After Dark? It’s here! And it is completely creeped out by the image above. It still loves Eugene Levy, and will continue to deliver all the best movie news and tidbits from around the web, but know that it is now uncomfortable.

We begin tonight with a first look at Eugene Levy and Jason Biggs on the set of American Reunion. Over at the ad-riddled site Collider, there are a number of photos of the cast as they get back together for yet more Pie. I suppose we should be excited about this.

Vulture’s Kyle Buchanan has a great piece about why movie aliens need a makeover. This comes in the wake of (and includes spoilers for) Super 8, so tread lightly. It’s a discussion you’ll certainly want to have after seeing J.J. Abrams’ latest.

GQ has published an interesting cover story profile of Captain America star Chris Evans, in which the article’s author eventually blacks out and forgets whether or not she got a chance to touch his chest. We’re pretty sure she raped him, but that’s only based on what we would do if we were blackout drunk with Chris Evans. Captain America is out this summer, or something.

Every ounce of me wants you to take a few moments out of your evening and read Nathan Rabin’s write-up of “Dustin Diamond: Behind the Bell,” the all-access pass, tell-all autobiography from the man who used to be Screech. It’s a fascinating review that makes the book sound like the most wonderful kind of mud-slinging trainwreck. Heck, take the entire evening and read both.

For one, I was not aware that there was a Transformers Hall of Fame. Second, why has it taken this long for Michael Bay to be inducted. Either way, he’s finally in. And now the Transformers Hall of Fame is awesome. See below as people in and around the franchise rub themselves all over Bay’s giant ego:

Over at Hero Complex, Ron Howard revisits Willow, a personal favorite of my own childhood. He also compares it to the upcoming task of adapting Stephen King’s Dark Tower, which will certainly have some of the same scope challenges.

Either Quentin Tarantino is running down the list of great working black actors or the media is running out of solid scoops, because Jamie Foxx being rumored for Django Unchained makes for the third major actor in as many weeks — between Will Smith, Idris Elba and Foxx, it’s going to be a name. That’s fine, we get it. Lets just announce the casting already.

Adorable Office secretary and once blowjob girl Ellie Kemper has joined 21 Jump Street. For those confused, here is the excellent Derrick Comedy short Blowjob Girl, with Kemper as the sinister titular character. It’s safe for work. Unless your workplace discourages raucous laughter. As for who she’ll play in Jump Street, I don’t care.

We close tonight with cuteness. Can you handle that? As you might know, Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark has finally opened on Broadway. And while it is getting absolutely panned by critics, and I mean demolished by critics, no words from a stuffy critic can be as biting as those spoken by a muppet. Which makes this Sesame Street parody even more adorably sinister. Behold, SpiderMonster: The Musical:

Neil Miller is the Founder and Publisher of Film School Rejects. For almost a decade, he has been talking movies on television, the radio, and the Internet. As of yet, no one has stopped him.

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