What is Movie News After Dark? When it was first being written tonight, it was going to be a very silly column. Then some serious (and seriously awesome) links were found and you were saved from a fate far more ridiculous than usual. We’ll save that for another time. In this moment, on this night, Movie News After Dark presents you with all kinds of interesting things, words and doo-dads. But most of all, there will be fun.

Aziz Ansari and Jesse Eisenberg are just around the building, ready to do something that will undoubtedly lead to hilarity in Ruben Fleischer’s 30 Minutes or Less, the film that will combine pizza delivery with the plot concept of Speed. Doesn’t that just make you urgently hungry? This new look is part of a slew of Entertainment Weekly magazine clippings found over at The Playlist.

Thomas Jane joined the Arrow in the Head podcast this week to spill the beans about his involvement in Sly Stallone’s Headshot. He will play a cop to Stallone’s lead character, who is a hitman. He will be a badass.

Matt Reeves is not yet ready to stop making vampire movies. He will next helm The Passage for Fox 2000, a vampire film — get this — based on a bestselling novel. It’s about terminally ill cancer patients who become healthy after being subjected to the bites of South American bats. Let me guess, they run into trouble when they begin to yearn for blood?

Looking for that two month late Valentine’s Day gift for your special lady friend (who we wouldn’t know because she goes to another school)? Here’s your opportunity to deck her out with sexy superhero pajamas. Just don’t hulk out and rip them off, they probably aren’t cheap.

Here is a bright and shiny new image from X-Men: First Class featuring Michael Fassbender and James McAvoy. Best caption for this (that does not involve an obvious constipation joke) in the comments section below wins a printed out copy of this photo, which I will probably forget to mail to you.

The producers of the Sharon Tate biopic, hot off their casting of Lindsay Lohan (awesome decision, guys, seriously) as the iconic lady who was killed by Charles Manson’s family, are also considering offering a role to Marilyn Manson. This second one works a little better, but still won’t make for anything resembling a respectable film.

Rubber director Quentin Dupieux’s has tweeted out the first image from his next film, Wrong. It’s apparently about a missing dog, but it’s “really funny” says the director. Right, and Rubber was just a movie about a killer tire.

In which Joss Whedon makes jokes about a possible Dr. Horrible sequel: “It’s going to be Dr. Horrible and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. And it’s going to be just as good as the other one. I don’t know why people are upset about that title. And by the way, by the time we finish it, Neil will be just as old. No, I’m not saying anything.”

Steven Banks, long time SpongeBob Squarepants and Jimmy Neutron writer, has been chosen to lead the writing team for the Arnold Schwarzenegger animated series The Governator. No matter how many people they hire, this idea still seems silly.

The first teaser trailer for Sundance and SXSW hit Bellflower has arrived from Oscilloscope Labs. It’s about two guys who love Mad Max, their car, and all sorts of mayhem. It’s also a love story. None of that comes through in this trailer, but check out them visuals:

The writers of Cracked, feeling at home in their newly designed digs, have put together a swell list of 8 movie special effects you won’t believe are real. I believe they’re all real. But I’ve already read the article, so my faith has thus been tested and broken. You soon shall follow.

Elizabeth Banks has joined The Hunger Games as Effie Trinket. I must stop here and admit that I have no idea what The Hunger Games is, nor do I have any idea why everyone is so excited about it. All I know is that these characters have ridiculous names. Based on what I’ve read about Banks’ character though, she will lead future teens to their deaths. Emphatically, I approve.

Speaking of things relatively new to me, there is Game of Thrones. Not new to me is the concept of awesome, which is the way I would describe the show’s opening titles.

There is a Star Wars themed parody of Rebecca Black’s “Friday.” That sort of thing was bound to come into existence at some point. I’m surprised it has take so long. That said, “Primeday” has its moments. See for yourself below.


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