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‘I, Frankenstein’ Trailer Reimagines the Monster As Attractive Action Star Because This Is World We Live In

I Frankenstein

Though not a sparkly vampire, Aaron Eckhart isn’t that much better as a rugged version of the Frankenstein monster (sorry, Adam Frankenstein) in the trailer for Stuart Beattie‘s I, Frankenstein. Far from the slow-moving, slow-witted monster we’re used to seeing terrorize villagers, the new reimagining of the Mary Shelley horror classic (this one is based on a graphic novel) has Eckhart surviving 200 years to the present day to become some sort of knife-wielding action hero.

You see, being composed of various dead body parts doesn’t make him an abomination of nature – it makes him a superhuman with strength and speed that can surpass any regular person. Like a corpse Voltron. It’s up to him to lead other good supernatural creatures in a fight to save mankind(?) from bad gargoyles(?) led by dark prince Bill Nighy. Guys, this looks really, really bad.

There’s also a savvy scientist (Yvonne Strahovski) who’s fascinated with his hot bod (it’s made of other bods!) who says things like “you’re only a monster if you behave like one,” and strokes his back. Mmm, pretty sure being the Frankenstein monster makes you a monster. But it’s a nice sentiment. Check out the trailer here:

There’s a lot going on that involves Eckhart brooding his way through a hellish CGI landscape full of fighting gargoyles, spewing action movie madlibs like “THIS ENDS TONIGHT” and “the human race depends on it.” Why any of this has to do with the Frankenstein monster is still left unanswered, but a trip to the Redbox next year might help.

I, Frankenstein is in theaters January 24, 2014.

In childhood, Samantha had a Mary Katherine Gallagher-esque flair for the dramatic, as well as the same penchant for Lifetime original movies. And while she can still quote the entire monologue from A Woman Scorned: The Betty Broderick Story, her tastes in film have luckily changed. During an interview, director Tommy Wiseau once called her a “good reporter, but not that intimidating if we’re being honest.” She once lived in Chinatown and told her neighbor Jake to “forget it” so many times that he threatened to stop talking to her.

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