Dieter Laser and Tom Six

While we were not in any way, shape, or form stressing over the apparent legal battles between Human Centipede director Tom Six and star Dieter Laser (still the greatest name in Hollywood), it looks like anyone who did give a toss about that kerfuffle can now breathe easy. The new year is really shaping up to be great, isn’t it?

EW reports that the pair have settled their battles (in brief, Six had been threatening to sue Laser for breach of contract after the actor reportedly requested “unacceptable script changes” for the third entry in the icky franchise), and Laser is now set to appear in the third film. Oh, thank goodness. There really is joy to be found in this cruel world.

Laser will reportedly take a lead role in the film, but he will not be reprising his character from the first entry. Instead, he and Human Centipede 2 “star Laurence R. Harvey are set to play a new, villainous duo ‘with a storyline no one will expect’ that will involve a centipede of “more than 500 people.” Well, it sounds like that storyline involves the two of them stitching people together for their own sick pleasure, so yeah, I think most people will expect just that. Six really has painted himself into a corner with this franchise, hasn’t he?

The third film will also reportedly involve “a big American celebrity,” so let’s all be on the lookout for the inevitable news that Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian has signed on.

The film will start production in May in the U.S.

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