Now that Fox has officially retracted its position that Vampires Suck, it finds itself free to do business with the second-most famous vampire hunter of all time. As all school-aged children know, Abraham Lincoln was not only a great president, he was also a cold killer when it came to the blood-fueled undead. Now, that story will finally see the big screen.

Fox would do well to check out my dreamcasting for the project in a recent Print to Projector entry, but with Tim Burton producing, 3 or 4 of the roles have probably already been mentally cast. I’ll give you a few guesses.

Timur Bekmambetov will be directing, which means that Burton might not necessarily get his common law wife, best friend, and other best friends in on the roles (because who really wants to see Johnny Depp play Lincoln?). However, the project is still a giant question mark in my mind because 1) it deals with vampires 2) Tim Burton has become a living cartoon version of himself, and his name anywhere near the project is cause for concern 3) Fox has a pretty bland track record from the past few years and 4) the liberal media will probably try and tell people that it’s a “fictional” take on Lincoln.

We all know the truth. That’s why we keep an axe by our bedside.

What do you think?

Source: Deadline Galveston


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