First Look: Sienna Miller in GI Joe

sienna01.jpgTake a look at hottie Sienna Miller standing in the rain. Now, any real GI Joe fan would be looking at this image and thinking “Where is the Baroness?” Fortunately, I’m well versed in Hollywood and can tell you a lot of this single image. This may get “spoilery” but its mostly conjecture, but I’ll be discussing what this picture means and breaking down what we’re seeing.

First we’ll talk about what’s wrong and then talk about why and/or how to fix it. First of all, Sienna is still blonde. Second, she is clearly at an American soldier’s funeral. Third, she isn’t dancing on his grave. So this tells us a few things. First, she is blonde. Second, she is no longer a wealthy heiress from Europe and third, she doesn’t start out as a member of COBRA and isn’t a bad girl – yet.

What does this mean for the film? Well, I’m assuming that the tragic death of a loved one in some mishandled way, possibly a direct result of the actions of a character like Duke or General Hawk. Noting in the picture the beret on the rifle, we can guess that this means, by Hollywood standards, that this was a Special Forces operative. So the death of her loved one, which she will blame on the Government, will push her into the arms of evil. Hopefully, in becoming evil, she decides to leave her entire life behind, move to Europe, and dye her hair black. That is what I’m guessing will happen. I, as a GI Joe purist, am initially upset by this, but not overly so, if it would play out as I’m assuming.

Now just for fun, wouldn’t it be crazy if the death of this soldier was faked so that he could join the GI Joe team as an international man of mystery and late in the third act its revealed that now enemies Duke (presumably) and Baroness are former lovers now on two sides of the same coin! If that turns out to be true, all of you, all you thousands of people, owe me a beer.

Anyway enjoy the first images and stay tuned for more!

Source: JFX Online

Robert Fure is many things: horror expert, ruggedly handsome man of the world, witty prose composer, and writer of his own biography page. Beneath the bravado is a scared little boy, ready to grow into an awesome man and make lies about a scared little boy inside of him. Wait a minute...

Read More from Robert Fure
Get Film School Rejects in your email. All the cool kids are doing it:
Previous Article
Next Article
Reject Nation
Leave a comment
Comment Policy: No hate speech allowed. If you must argue, please debate intelligently. Comments containing selected keywords or outbound links will be put into moderation to help prevent spam. Film School Rejects reserves the right to delete comments and ban anyone who doesn't follow the rules. We also reserve the right to modify any curse words in your comments and make you look like an idiot. Thank You!