What is Casting Couch? It’s where Hollywood moms come every day to find out if their actor kids have gotten a job.

Remember that movie about the day JFK got shot that Tom Hanks was putting together because these days he’s such a history loving, lame dad? It’s called Parkland, and it just put together an awesome cast. According to Collider, director Vincent Bugliosi has signed the terrific trio of Paul Giamatti, Jackie Weaver, and Billy Boy Thornton to headline the cast. There’s no word on what characters they’ll be playing, but my guess is Giamatti will be JFK, Thornton will be Jackie O, and Weaver will be Lee Harvey Oswald. Makes sense, no?

Benedict Cumberbatch

Benedict Cumberbatch

Not only is Benedict Cumberbatch awesome in the BBC’s preemptive Elementary ripoff, Sherlock, he also has the most fun name to say in the entire world. Benedict Cumberbatch. So it’s with great joy we report that THR has a new scoop regarding the thespian’s career. Apparently he’s just signed on to star in a biopic about The Beatles’ closeted, drug and gambling addicted, gone-too-soon manager Brian Epstein. Sherlock vet Paul McGuigan will direct from a Todd Graff screenplay. Cumberbatch!

Elijah Wood

Elijah Wood

There’s something weird about Elijah Wood. His eyes are just too blue, and he never seems to age. That’s why it comes as no surprise that Deadline is reporting he has Cooties. In this case, Cooties is a horror comedy about killer children attacking their teachers that Wood will both star in and produce. Want to be creeped out again? Cooties comes from a script by Insidious writer Leigh Whannell and Glee co-creator Ian Brennan. What the what?

Kurt Russell

Kurt Russell

If the concept of a Horror Western wasn’t cool enough already, screenwriter S. Craig Zahler gets extra brownie points for titling the Horror Western he’s written for his own directorial debut Bone Tomahawk. Now that’s a manly title for a movie, in need of a manly cast to support it. Rejoice, then, that Variety is reporting Zahler has already recruited Kurt Russell, Richard Jenkins, Peter Sarsgaard, and Jennifer Carpenter for the pic. Well, Sarsgaard and Carpenter aren’t all that manly… but, Russell and Jenkins!

Gerard Butler

Gerard Butler

Seeing as everybody spent their pre-Halloween weekend taking in multiple viewings of Gerard Butler’s inspirational surfing movie Chasing Mavericks (I assume, I spent mine looking at slutty Halloween costumes in the bar), it only makes sense that Butler would get signed up for another inspirational sports movie lickity split. His next one is called Dynamo, and it’s about soccer. Or, apparently, soccer and Nazis. Deadline reports that Butler will be playing goalie Nikolai Trusevich, who led the Ukrainians in a legendary football match against Hitler’s high-socked supermen.

John Cusack

John Cusack

Like John Cusack? Like John Cusack starring in movies based on Stephen King stories? Good news, because he’s just signed up to do another one. Screen Daily reports that he’s following up Stand By Me and 1408 by starring in Cell, a story that’s said to be about a man’s desperate search for his wife and son after a catastrophic pulse gets sent out by people’s cell phones. Sounds like the Pulse sequel that a grasping world has been crying out for ever since 2006. Finally.

Emmy Rossum

Emmy Rossum

The latest news about that Hillary Swank-has-Polio movie You’re Not You was that Shameless’ saucy dish Emmy Rossum had signed up to play the Swank character’s caretaker. Well, THR has dug up some new news regarding the project, and it’s that Transformers dreamboat Josh Duhamel has signed on to play some other sort of caretaker, this one the cocky kind who Rossum’s character predictably runs afoul of. Love is in the air. If this movie sounded like chick stuff before, now it’s pretty much guaranteed to be.

Romany Malco

Romany Malco

Despite head-turning roles in things like The 40-Year-Old Virgin and Showtime’s Weeds, Romany Malco has yet to really break out as a big name in the world of fast-talking but handsome comic actors. Perhaps his big break is still yet to come, because Deadline is reporting that he’s just joined the high profile cast of Last Vegas, that movie that’s The Hangover with old guys starring Michael Douglas, Robert De Niro, Morgan Freeman, and Kevin Klein. Malco will reportedly be playing the hotel concierge, A.K.A. the guy who gives ladies something to look at if they get stuck watching this movie.

Kevin Corrigan

Kevin Corrigan

Akiva Goldsman has been a writer and producer of high profile film projects for a while now, so it only makes sense that he’d want to branch out and try his hand at directing. His first flick as director will be Winter’s Tale, an adaptation of a Mark Helprin novel about a hotly pursued home invader falling in love with his latest victim, all set in 1916. Variety’s latest report about the project is that awesome character actor Kevin Corrigan is the newest name to join the cast… but look at the people who are already on board: Colin Farrell, Russell Crowe, Will Smith, William Hurt, Jennifer Connelly, Matt Bomer, Eva Marie Saint and Jessica Brown Findlay, oh my. How have we failed to report on this one yet? Shame, shame.


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