MichaelBayTransformers3

This news post is a little interactive because it’s a Choose Your Own Newsventure-style post. That phrase is copyrighted. Don’t even think about it.

  1. Did you like Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen?

If you answered “yes,” read paragraph A. If you answered “no,” read paragraph B.

A.

In what might be the best news of the entire damned month, it looks like Michael “Awesome” Bay is heading back into the drawing room with Steven Spielberg and writer Ehren Kruger to map out what they want to see happen in Transformers 3. According to Bay’s personal website, they will announce whether we have to wait two or three years (cross your fingers for 2011!) to have what’s left of our faces blown off by a third installment of huge explosions, big fucking robots and Megan Fox cleavage.

Man, I can’t wait! This is going to be totally rad awesome to the max!

What do you think?

B.

Ugh. Holy God.

For some reason, the movie Gods have seen it fit to punish the world at large by allowing Michael “Total Hack” Bay to both still exist and to have the greenlight for a third Transformers movie. According to his personal website, that hack loser will be grabbing lunch with Steven Spielberg and writer Ehren Kruger, and planning their concepts for Transformers 3. They’ll also be setting the doomsday clock for either 2011 or 2012 so we all know exactly how long we have to cherish our loved ones before another Bay bomb gets dropped into theaters and further drags down the integrity of the American filmmaking community.

Damn it all, someone shoot me before this thing gets to the production stage.

And, Oh Crap, Bad Boys 3 is on the horizon, too?…

What do you think?


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