Years from now, cinema fanatics will probably look back at 2012 fondly, remembering that this year brought us new films from Spielberg, Bigelow, Anderson (P.T.), Haneke, Affleck, Anderson (Wes), Van Sant, Arnold, Tarantino, Johnson, and many, many more. But amidst all the good stuff (and, rest assured, there was plenty of good stuff to go around), there were plenty of rotten, silly, messy, sloppy, boring, and insulting films to fill our theaters and empty our heads. The worst, if you will. Just the worst.
Settle in, gird your loins, and prepare yourself for The 12 Worst Films of 2012, as determined by your faithful Rejects. Oh, 2012, you really packed some doozies.
Who doesn’t love to party, right? Gather a few friends, drink a few beers, level half a city block as if the theme of the fete were “Bring Your Own Insurgents to The Party.” The worst aspect of Project X is not its wholly unlikable cast, teens who run the gamut from scamp to sociopath, but rather the crass and basic manner by which it celebrates consequence-free douchery. Or perhaps we need focus on the lascivious way the cinematographer lens-gropes female characters purported to be under eighteen. Ultimately, with all moral scruples lain aside, Project X is just plain lazy, uninteresting tripe. -Brian Salisbury
The Devil Inside
I don’t know what was more offensive about The Devil Inside: its softball non-ending or the fact that it made an unprecedented $33M on its opening weekend. (For the record, that’s more than the opening weekend for John Carter, The Expendables 2, Life of Pi, and Lincoln.) This year has seen some of the worst found footage movies, and things kicked off with this nonsensical exorcist film. Featuring scenes that rip off better movies (like The Last Exorcism), a creepy poster that has no relevance to the film itself, and Roman citizens who speak English with cheesy Mario and Luigi accents, The Devil Inside started 2012 out all wrong. -Kevin Carr
This Must Be The Place
This “surrealist” misfire from director Paolo Sorrentino is not only one of the worst movies of the year, but features one of the worst, most bizarre performances of the year from star Sean Penn. Penn plays Robert Smith-circa-The Cure lookalike Cheyenne, who lives in seclusion in a Dublin mansion with his firefighter wife Jane (Frances McDormand). Penn-as-Cheyenne talks like a brain damaged little girl on helium and creates an annoying, whiny character who sets out on a Nazi hunting extravaganza across the US of A. Not only is Penn absolutely insufferable, the film is aimless, boring, self-important and its loose ends wreak of re-edits. David Byrne contributed the score and appears in the film (re: the film’s title), which would normally be pretty damn awesome, if it weren’t for the fact that he turns in a terrible performance of his own. -Caitlin Hughes