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WTF: I Want My Jaws 3D!

About a year and a half ago, I had the good fortune to interview the guys behind the RealD 3D movie system. They were showing off a scene from Beowulf at Comic-Con in 2007, and they did a Q&A afterwards. At this meeting, they predicted that 3D exhibition in theaters would skyrocket in the coming years.

And they were right. After a rush of 3D animated films (e.g., Chicken Little, Meet the Robinsons, Monster House and Bolt), we are seeing wider expansion of this format into theaters. Most recently, My Bloody Valentine 3D made a huge splatter-splash at the box office as the first R-rated RealD release.

In a few months, we’ll get another teen horror flick coming to the screens in glorious 3D – Final Destination: Death Trip 3D. I can’t wait.

The new 3D experience is so cool that it can make a mediocre film really pretty awesome. And that got me thinking…

What the Friday the 13th Part III?

There’s a whole host of 3D processes that have been used over the years, but the basic principle is the same: shoot with two images to create depth perception.

If they can resurrect and old Chip ‘N’ Dale short film for the 3D format (which was presented ahead of Meet the Robinsons last year), why can’t they bring some classic 3D movies to life again in digital projection. After all, if the prints are available, can’t it just be brought into the computer and remastered for modern theaters?

For the kiddies out there, I’m not talking about “older” movies like Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over or The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl. I’m talking about much older films… classics like The Creature from the Black Lagoon and Jaws 3D.

This would be a win-win for studios. There’s relatively low production costs… just what it takes to digitize the old prints and remaster them for modern projection. They end up doing that every couple years anyway for subsequent DVD releases. No high-end director or star salaries needed.

3D is so awesome and available that these films could make a very profitable midnight movie series around the country, don’t you think?

If you agree, link out to this online petition I have created, demanding the conversion of classic 3D films to the new digital RealD format.

As food for thought, here’s a list of the top eight films I’d most like to see brought back to life:

    House of Wax (not the Paris Hilton one)
    Jaws 3D
    It Came from Outer Space
    The Creature from the Black Lagoon
    Robot Monster
    Friday the 13th Part 3
    Amityville 3D
    Dial M for Murder

Kevin Carr crawled from the primordial ooze in the early 1970s. He grew up watching movies to the point of irritation for his friends and was a font of useless movie knowledge until he decided to put that knowledge to good use. Now, Kevin is a nationally syndicated critic, heard on dozens of radio stations around the country, and his reviews appear in a variety of online outlets. Kevin is also a proud member of the Broadcast Film Critics Association (BFCA), the Online Film Critics Society (OFCS), and the Central Ohio Film Critics Association (COFCA).

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