The 10 Deadliest Movie Monsters of All Time


Blood: The Last Vampire is going to suck.  You in.  Or maybe it won’t, and it will just suck.  Either way, it looks fairly bad ass and features vampires who are down to spill the red stuff, so we’re interested in it.  In fact, when it comes to movie monsters, I’ll personally watch just about everything.  Sure, I may have left Wyvern on my DVR for literally 5 months before getting around to watching the Alaskan Dragon kill some honkys, but I did get around to it and even enjoyed myself.  Currently Razortooth is my neglected monster movie of choice.  I’ll watch it sometime this year.

Anyway, whenever a monster turns up on the screen we start our little pea-brains thinking about similar things- namely the deadliest movie monsters to tear up the silver scream and shit out our entrails.  Then we wrote them down in a easy to digest list form because that’s how we roll and we know you prefer looking at pictures anyways.  Feast on.  Although, I will warn you – like any assignment handed down to me, I refuse to take it seriously.  So by deadliest I mean awesomest, and by awesomest I mean I grade on a real steep curve.

10.  Jaws from Jaws


I fully intend to avoid most of the standard movie monsters people toss around, but Jaws is a badass.  She’s so badass that she never had a name.  She was just a rogue great white shark with a taste for human flesh and a thirst for vengeance that passed on through her loins.  The oft quoted word around this film is that it made you scared to go in the water and it’s no joke – people avoided getting past their knees that year.

9.  Killer Tomatoes from Attack! of the Killer Tomatoes


I’m not sure if anyone has ever said Eat your vegetables or they’ll eat you! but they fucking should have.  I hate tomatoes – can’t stand them.  Not in my salads, not on my sandwiches.  And they aren’t even vegetables. The only good tomato is one that has been smashed into a fine paste.  No wonder these bouncy bastards put the fear into both me and George Clooney.

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Robert Fure is many things: horror expert, ruggedly handsome man of the world, witty prose composer, and writer of his own biography page. Beneath the bravado is a scared little boy, ready to grow into an awesome man and make lies about a scared little boy inside of him. Wait a minute...

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