February 18th

Big Mommas: Like Father Like Son

Who did it? Directed by John Whitesell; Written by Matthew Fogel; Starring Martin Lawrence and Brandon T. Jackson

What is it? Fat suits and cross-dressing.

Why should we care? Did you know that Big Momma’s House was a June release back in 2000? It was a summer hit! It made over $170 million worldwide. That was a decade ago. The fat suit should have been hung up long ago.

Watch the trailer:


I Am Number Four

Who did it? Directed by DJ Caruso; Written by Alfred Gough, Miles Millar; Starring Timothy Olyphant, Alex Pettyfer, Teresa Palmer, and Kevin Durand

What is it? A remake of Jumper but with alien teens being hunted and killed instead of The Tomorrow People… and as bad as you may feel for Number Four just imagine what life is like being Number Two.

Why should we care? The novel this flick is based upon is co-written by James Frey of A Million Little Pieces fame, so right away we know the story isn’t true. If that isn’t enough to turn you away then prepare to be at least mildly entertained by the first of what threatens to be a franchise. Caruso shows little personality behind the camera, but he is more than capable of making fun action movies that score low in the smarts department. The trailer highlights some cool looking effects and set pieces, and you can never go wrong with Olyphant or Palmer.

Watch this clip from the film:


Unknown

Who did it? Directed by Jaume Collet-Serra; Written by Oliver Butcher and Stephen Cornwell; Starring Liam Neeson, January Jones and Diane Kruger

What is it? After a crash leaves their cab in the river and Dr. Martin Harris in a coma, he wakes up to find all of his memories are either wrong or someone is playing a cruel trick on him.

Why should we care? This flick has all the right ingredients to be that special brand of intrigue where conspiracy or madness are the only two options. It feels a bit like The Game and The Fugutive (which are two great movies), but can the director of House of Wax and Orphan live up to that legacy? Who knows. No matter what, Liam Neeson is going to kick any ass that gets in his way or that asks him for his AARP card.

Watch the trailer:


Vanishing On 7th Street

Who did it? Directed by Brad Anderson; Written by Anthony Jaswinski; starring Hayden Christensen, Thandie Newton, and John Leguizamo

What is it? An episode of The Twilight Zone… if The Twilight Zone was still around and ran ninety minutes instead of twenty-two.

Why should we care? Anderson’s Session 9 is a solidly creepy film, and while his followups have been good they have yet to capture that same degree of quiet menace. The story here, about a group of strangers who awaken to an otherwise abandoned city with terrible things happening in the dark, feels reminiscent of old Twilight Zone or Outer Limits episodes (not to mention the recent UK indie The Last Seven), but hopefully it can sustain its mystery beyond the point of revelation.

Watch the trailer:


Finish strong…


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