This week, I have been mostly losing all of my free time to the dark corridors of eBay, dredging the murky waters for a decent metaphor and the hidden nuggets of merchandise gold amongst the seemingly endless amounts of over-priced silt.Obviously you get some utter shit – like this genuine piece of brick from the Asda car-park featured in The Full Monty (why exactly?) – but those willing to trawl through the collected detritus and Twilight paraphenalia can still find some wonderful potential additions to their own collections.
But then, eBay these days is something of a seller’s market when you get to the really high-end merch, so unless you stumble across a kindly old lady who has no idea of the true worth of the treasure’s she is posting, it’s not exactly likely you’ll ever find a real bargain that will find you featured in your local paper grinning like a moron under some headline shouting of your incredible good fortune in buying the real ruby necklace from Titanic for a buck or something.
Anyway, the long and short of that meandering opening gambit is that stuff is expensive. It is a recession after all. Or at least I think it still is. So picking up the kind of delightful trinkets and treasures below is no longer for the feint-hearted: but if you have a few spare (hundred) dollars, there are some really beautiful, frivolous things you can spend it on to feed your habits.
1.Con Air Movie Crew Jacket
I’m pretty sure it is scientifically impossible to prove whether or not Con Air is good or not. Variously hailed as both the best and worst film in the world, the bonkers actioner rates as the perfect empty-headed popcorn flick in my book, and the idea of being able to wear a cast and crew jacket from the set is enough to make me froth at the jodpurs.
Yes it costs a spot under $500, but it’s unlikely you will ever get closer to really being Nic Cage. Because if you acted as badly as he consistently did, there’s no way you’d even get anywhere near Hollywood.
Still, live the dream and work it like a boss.
Buy one here.
2. Lego Batman
With the news of more Lego Batman on the horizon (as well as a sequel to the wonderful video game), and harking back to a previous edition of this column in which I waxed lyrical about the Lego Batman lines generally, it brings me inordinate amounts of pleasure to have discovered that it is possible to buy all of the major Batman characters as Lego figures all from one buyer. In exchange for a relatively reasonable sum – $399.99 (I did say “relatively”) – fanatics can pick up a 20 figure bundle including all of the major members of the Bat’s Rogues’ Gallery. Money shouldn’t really be a concern here, because these little blighters are like actual gold-dust, and amassing them by buying individual Lego packs would be an astronomically expensive endeavour.
Pick a set up here.
3. Back To The Future 20th Anniversary Box Set
If there’s one thing my time spent spending way too much money on little plastic film toys has taught me, it’s that the Japanese really know how to package things. Which is why I am featuring a prestigious DVD boxset for only the second time in the history of this column: but really this four disc package is so much more than just a DVD. The sheer amount of BTTF related merchandise within the box makes it no less than a treasure trove for fans, and most importantly it is rare enough for Western collectors to get extremely excited about (and the near $90 asking price is a snip compared to future value).
It’s probably not a good idea to attach the licence plate to your car though – the police don’t look on that sort of thing with anything like the sense of humour you might imagine.
Buy one here.
T-Shirt of the Week
“What is your damage, Heather?”