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This is your lucky week because you’re getting more Coroner than you know what to do with.  Coming to you a bit early we have The Hunger: The Complete First Season on DVD, available today.  This 1997 series is comprised of 22 episodes for 616 minutes of your viewing pleasure.  If only they could have added another 50 minutes in there.  The show ran for two seasons and each 30 minute episode dealt with someone’s “hunger” – be it for power, money, or, usually, sex.  Brother’s Tony and Ridley Scott served as producers on the show with Tony directing the first episode – The Swords.

the_Hunger_DVDNow, I didn’t sit down with a notepad and watch every single episode and mark down every single kill and every single boob (not enough paper) because that gets tedious if you have more than 10 hours of footage to sift through, but I will give you an overview of the series in the traditional KILLeR format.

Kills

The show isn’t too heavy on muuurrrrder though in every episode you’re likely to see between one and three people die.

Ills

Not overly gory ever, the show does have some stabbings, beatings, stranglings, blood and the odd strange sight – like grossly deformed old lady legs or a tail sprouting from a nude woman’s butt area who then fires an intestine like feeding tube out of her mouth and into her prey.  Or should that have gone under lust?

Lust

This is where the show really scenes.  Its hard to find an episode that doesn’t deal explicitly with sex and in doing so, showing off boobs, butts, and even full frontal shots.  One episode features an orgy like scene while another has Lena Headey (yes, that Lena Headey) getting all dominate over Daniel Craig (yes, that Daniel Craig).  In terms of kink there is a bed that is kind of alive and totally down to screw your brains out – no, not like, kill you.  But to really just have hands and heads pop out and service you.  Though I think my favorite is probably from an episode called Room 17 where an ultra-hot adult program comes to life on the TV and the woman, a la The Ring, comes part way out of the TV not to kill, but to give a blow job.  In fact, this series is so about sex, check out my bullet point, edited synopsis list that covers every episode.

Learning

There is always some sort of moral at the end, though its generally don’t trust a crazy bitch or be careful what you wish for- especially if what you wish for is sex with a crazy bitch.

Review

If you took Tales from the Dark Side and mixed it with Tales from the Crypt and then soaked it in nudity for two weeks you’d get something close to The Hunger.  The show never manages to scare you but it never really tries.  Rather in its short 24 minute run time The Hunger is content to plot out a little mystery, show you some boobs, then make a character regret something or die or both.  Tales from the Crypt is a far superior show, but if you like that and you ever thought to yourself “More boobs, less killing” then you’ve found the perfect show.

Unfortunately, Tony Scott’s throw-up style of editing is all over the credits, making them, for me, unwatchable.  Honestly, I watched the opening credits only one time and was so put off by the overly long, needlessly fast cuts that I couldnt’ and wouldn’t submit myself to watching them again.  Skip them, every time.  While you’re at it, skip the opening and closing commentary by host Terrance Stamp as well.  He comes across like a bored Shakespearian actor phoning in laughable lines – which is pretty much what is happening.  The Crypt Keeper was cheesy and ran with it – this is just a waste of time.  You don’t even need the intro or outro to understand whats happening, so save yourself two minutes.

Tony Scott’s entry, The Swords, is one of the worst on the disc.  Boring and predictable it never captivates the audience, moves at a snails pace, and struggles to come up with a point at the end.  Plus, his frenetic style is all over it, but putting fast cuts in a slow story is like painting the Mona Lisa in neon colors and spinning it in circles.  The other episodes don’t reach greatness, but they do entertain and provide plenty of hot female flesh to watch.  Some are genuinely entertaining and interesting.  How interesting?  Time for my select synopsis.  What I did here was, forget the episode title and the point, but just withdrew a short snippet from the DVD box to show you just how much these revolve around sex.  As a programming note, these are not in Air Date order, but rather DVD presentation order which may differ.

  1. a visit to a fetish club
  2. her employer has sexual desires that must be fulfilled
  3. he falls for a beautiful young woman
  4. Episode 4 isn’t about sex
  5. A newly-married couple decides to spend their honeymoon
  6. orders an adult channel on his cable television
  7. all feature a young woman, whom he names Anais
  8. fantasies involving role play
  9. a university professor rejects an attempted seduction
  10. when an ex-lover re-enters his life
  11. this dress, however, exacts a terrible price
  12. surprising news about the family she’s marrying into
  13. team him how to seduce and kill
  14. when a woman takes a job as a security guard
  15. she discovers a fellow patient is a vampire and offers to help him
  16. she is cared for by two mysterious women
  17. the apparition of a beautiful woman brings back memories of his past affair
  18. they were all obsessed with the same woman
  19. claims to be a traveling sex-aid salesman
  20. he can’t ignore the advances of his young assistant
  21. plagued by visions of a beautiful mistress
  22. a woman with a voracious appetite for men

So, as you can see, The Hunger packs some kink, which is why I enjoyed it.  The series isn’t great, but then again most similar series aren’t either.  This is a nice, easy way to spend some time watching nude women without getting yelled at for being a perv.  If you skip over all the Terrance Stamp parts and all of the beginning and end credits, you’ll actually find a pretty enjoyable, campy, naked time.  Plus, you’ll recognize all sorts of actors, like Daniel Craig, Karen Black, Jason Flemyng, Colin Ferguson, Lena Headey, Margot Kidder, Timothy Spall, and Balthazar Getty.  And did I mention the girls are naked and ridiculously hot?  I think I did.  the only extra is a behind the scenes look at Season 2 hosted by David Bowie, a significant role in that season.

Grade: C


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