The Coroner's Report - LargeThere comes a time in every man’s life when he has to take a risk. When looking for a title to review this week, I was faced with a dilemma. Namely, I was tired and stuck on my computer, which mean Blu-ray was out of the question. I could have spent ages pouring through the Netflix queue, or I could dive into “the pile.” Every critic has a pile – movies you’ve been sent to review that aren’t topical, timely, or generally wanted. Stuff you should review, but won’t feel bad if you never get to it. I went to the pile and pulled Psycho Sleepover, a low budget movie filmed in 2007 and released by Troma in 2010 and sent my way in 2011.

Psycho Sleepover is a strange flick. It’s low budget to the point that it was pretty much literally all filmed in one location – the producer’s house. A lot of the people behind the camera end up in front of it. The quality isn’t so great. The plot is non-sense. Basically 30 psycho-slasher killers walk out of an unlocked Asylum and head to a sleepover to get their murder on while a couple of dudes make a ton of dick jokes and masturbate.

In “The Making Of” extra, the co-director says of the film: it’s pretty retarded, but it’s awesome. He was 60% right.

Kills

If the movie doesn’t get an A for technical ability (it doesn’t), it sure gets one for enthusiasm, racking up, by my count, 29 on-screen kills. There are a couple of severe injuries that may have ended up in death, so one could probably assume the actual number of deaths is around 36 or so.

Ills

The blood spills freely, even if it is a bit too syrupy, but again, this is a film made by guys in their friend’s house more or less. A face gets ripped off, there are a ton of stabbings, a bunch of headshots, a face gets blown off, a few necks get slashed, a cock or two gets severed, a guy is sodomized to death by a pool cue, and a hand is stuck in a blender. I’d say two of my favorite ills are when a head gets stomped and explodes and when a girl gets hit in the gut with a sledgehammer so hard she throws up.

Lust

There are a couple of disappointing pairs of tits, a kind of gross pair of tits, and a decent pair of tits. There are some good looking ladies in the film but ultimately the movie is defined by dudes masturbating and talking about blowjobs. One of the opening lines of the film is I don’t know how to say this, but I want you to suck my dick. And you know what, it’s hilarious. Also, dildos. Dildos everywhere.

Learning

Girls, for the love of Christ, suck your man’s dick. This entire massacre could have been avoided with blowjobs.

Review

Surprisingly, Psycho Sleepover is pretty entertaining. I found a lot of the corny dialog about blowjobs and boners pretty hilarious. This is definitely a movie for immature boys – if that’s you, it’s actually a pretty good time for the most part. The litmus test for this flick is probably whether or not you find this line funny: Maybe I’ll get that boner I’ve always wanted. Is that funny? If you clicked Yes, you should watch this movie. If you clicked No, avoid it like the plague.

Psycho Sleepover is a horror movie made while on drugs. Now, I know about some drugs, but I can’t even begin to tell you what you’d have to be on to create this film. Chingy has a cameo in a film-within-a-film called Murder Pizza and he proudly announces, after promising free pizza, that It’s murder pizza, bitch! Oh, and his victims are two Suicide Girl looking lesbians.

While the film is only 84 minutes long or so, it still does start to drag on about three quarters of the way through. It’s silly through-out and the production value, again, is pretty low, but it has got some strange, acid trip balls hanging out. Some of the acting is actually okay, though it’s always over the top, and the variety of shitty psycho slashers is mildly amusing. Sometimes there is even a 16-bit style score going on. The film is all over the place and you’re either with it or you hate. Personally, I was with it most of the time and found myself pleasantly surprised. This film isn’t for everyone, not even close, but if you’re alright with low production values and insanely immature humor (dick blowjob dick cum fart cunt blowjob boner boner boner), then you owe it to yourself to experience this mindfuck of a film. Oh, and in addition to Chingy, Felissa Rose (Sleepaway Camp) and Lloyd Kaufman have cameos.


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