4. The Man Of Steel Gets Shanked in Superman Returns
There’s no defending Lex Luthor’s idiot plan in this film, however his prison gang-style beating of the Last Son Of Krypton was downright evil genius. Once you get that green rock around this guy he just becomes a weirdo in a cape – so it’s only proper to get gritty on his ass with a good hearty punch and kick session. And boy does he take it like a 13-year-old band kid. Just wussy flails all the way.
But then comes the crowning moment when Lex, an ex-inmate himself, sneaks up behind Big Blue and sticks him right in his side with a Kryptonite shiv – uttering a scornful, “Now fly” and dumping his ass in the ocean. If you ask me, if they had the balls they would have just rolled credits right there for the hell of it.
3. The Comedian Gets Tossed Out A Window in The Watchmen
Who the hell wears a button pin on their bathrobe? That, my friends, is how you wake up with a prick. Then again, the Comedian already seems like kind of a prick to begin with. Man – that’s just the kind of joke he would have loved.
This music definitely helps the scene as the Comedian gets his comedian ass handed over to him to the tune of Nat King Cole doing “Unforgettable.” But man, you’d think he’d do a better job of defending himself, what with the power of slow motion. You know when you take that into account – in reality they probably only got through the first 30 seconds of that song before he hit the ground.
2. Bane Humiliates Batman in The Dark Knight Rises
It’s simple. No big score, no explosive flips or crazy gadgets, just two men who happen to be dressed like bondage gimps going hand-to-hand in a sewer waterfall the size of a mall. Okay – maybe it isn’t simple, but boy is this scene dark and dirty.
Bane is the most charismatic villain of this series in terms of people that you don’t mind seeing killed – if that makes any sense. He’s eloquent and entertaining enough to carry his tremendous evil with every step but no so funny that it’s hard to see him go. Also he has the voice of a Venture Brothers character.
1. Big Daddy Goes Down in Kick-Ass
On a scale from “put the bunny back in the box” to “I’m a vampire” I’d put this Nicolas Cage freak out somewhere in the vicinity of “killing me won’t bring back your goddamn honey!”. I mean – it’s justified, what with the fire – in fact it’s probably the most justified freak out of his career, which will no doubt be studied by scholars sometime in the not too distant future.
This scene is great because it shows the real-world threat of dressing up like an asshole and going after mobsters: sometimes they won’t build an elaborate contraption but rather just beat the shit out of you before lighting you on fire. It’s much more effective than creating a rocket powered surf board or trying to think of the perfect riddle to stick on a security guard’s corpse.